Time stands still after Homer crashes his car and flies through the windshield. As his life flashes before his eyes, a magical friend helps Homer learn the secret truth about his marriage.
Krusty opens a school for clowning, and it becomes the most successful thing he's ever done.
When a plague of insects shuts down Springfield, the Simpsons face their greatest challenge yet.. spending time in lockdown with each other.
When Marge and Lisa start a charity together, Marge is seduced by the money and prestige of Big Charity fundraising
Homer publicly disparages a pop singer and faces the ire of her vindictive and highly organized fan army.
A mysterious figure from Marge's past returns to coach her for a bowling tournament.
By fanning the flames of hate and division instead of embracing historical fact, nobody Kirk Van Houten rises from obscurity to become arbiter of Springfield Elementary's curriculum--leading to a fascist, dystopian future where Kirk is Springfield's dictator.
When Bart's latest prank leads to chaos at Springfield Elementary, Marge and Homer dream of a world in which their rambunctious son was never a Simpson.
When Carl is smitten by a beautiful black woman, he looks into the roots of his own identity by discovering the origins of a mysterious rodeo buckle.
Flanders goes to work for Fat Tony.
Through a series of YouTube recommended videos, the story of the rise and fall of The Simpson Family Vlog is revealed.
When Coach Moe recruits the world's greatest brawlers to teach Nelson the art of hockey goonery, Simpsons fans are enraged by a second hockey episode in 35 years.
When Bart discovers a profitable glitch in an online game, he ropes Principal Skinner into his lucrative criminal enterprise. Meanwhile Marge and Maggie discover paradise.
A future tale of the will-they-won't-they-I-guess-they-won't-maybe-they-will of Springfield's most unlikely couple.
Homer has a rival in Grampa's love in a "Step Brothers" scenario.
Homer teaches Duffman on how to be a better father.
In a book-themed trilogy, Marge's resentment takes monstrous form, Lisa tries to save the planet through murder and Homer learns he's not the man he thought he was.
In this "Treehouse of Horror" Halloween episode.. Homer and his teenaged friends are pursued by a killer clown in a spoof of Stephen King's novel "It".
Marge is hired as a segment producer on Krusty's new daytime talk show. But her initial excitement about the job fades when she discovers what an endless nightmare it is.
When the Boy Explorers become co-ed, Bart and Lisa vow to "out scout" each other at the annual jamboree.
Lisa gets called for jury duty while Marge becomes obsessed with her exercise bike.
After Homer humiliates himself in a town meeting, he looks for acceptance in an internet group hunting for a missing tortoise but finds something much more sinister.
After Bart humiliates him at church, Homer finally teaches his son to admire his dad - until a visit from a magical, singing janitor changes everything they thought they knew.
Grampa finds himself in a pickle when his hidden hamburger past comes back to "ketchup" with him.
A surprise from Marge's past has her bonding with Bart and terrifying Homer.
When Lisa joins the high school marching band, she finds an unlikely mentor in Shauna Chalmers. Meanwhile, Homer becomes a craft beer brewer.
Bart can't control his feelings when he gets a new teacher. Meanwhile, Lisa befriends an octopus.
Lisa meets the son of the late musician Bleeding Gums Murphy - and attempts to improve his life.
Cletus discovers that his wife Brandine has been hiding a secret love.. of learning.
When Bart befriends a famous kid influencer who owns an ultra-cool skate wear brand, Homer leads a rebellion of loser dads against them.
When Homer is erroneously blamed for leaving Santa's Little Helper locked in a hot car, footage of the incident goes viral, outraging all of Springfield and making Homer a pariah.
Bart, Martin and the bullies are on the run for their lives when a wilderness weekend takes a chilling turn.
When Homer and Marge are lost in an icy wilderness, they must push themselves to their limits to survive.
Marge and Mr. Burns fight for soul of a brash young football prodigy.
Fat Tony becomes Godfather to Maggie Simpson.
Teenage Homer and Grampa go on a road trip to ease their sorrow.
Smithers finds true love with a famous fashion designer, but will his new relationship destroy Springfield? Find out.
Things for Ned and Homer go from bad to gosh-darn worse as their prestige crime thriller nightmare continues.
When a ruthless debt collector comes to Springfield, Homer and Ned's lives are sucked into the artfully violent world of prestige TV.
Marge puts a hurtful word in Lisa's brain and Bart gets swole.
Evergreen Terrace is overrun with traffic and Moe has a fateful choice to make.
Bong Joon-ho's "Parasite," Bambi's revenge and much, much more are featured.
When Grampa falls victim to a phone scammer, the Simpsons set out on a mission of vengeance to get his money back.
A musical comes to life in Springfield as Marge stages a revival of her beloved high school show - but her wonderful memories are threatened by the return of a rival from the past.
After Moe breaks their most sacred rule, a secret society of bartenders seeks ultimate vengeance on Homer and his friends.
A British secret agent comes to Springfield in search of a Russian spy.
Lisa makes a shocking college decision, wounding Marge. It leads to a very surprising place.
Lisa gets an imaginary friend who makes her feel much better about her friends. Meanwhile, Homer gets a vehicle with awesome torque.
Mr. Burns gets into the plant-based burger business. Lisa refuses to believe he's up to no good.
We learn that Chief Wiggum's wife is more than she seems. Meanwhile, Marge takes part in a jewel heist.
A secret from Flanders' past is revealed; a never-before-seen room in the Simpson home.
Homer tries to reunite a mechanical band from his youth, but film and TV creator J.J. Abrams gets ahold of them first.
Cletus becomes a singing sensation, while Homer becomes a new man. Then, Cletus turns on his fans, ruining everything.
Bart becomes a successful caddy, but Marge worries it is ruining his character.
Bart finds his old teacher's diary and learns a surprising secret. Then, Lisa discovers an even bigger surprise.
Comic Book Guy and his wife Kumiko debate having a baby and we learn his awesome origin story.
A cable channel films a Christmas movie in Springfield and Skinner falls in love.
Lisa calls her teacher, Ms. Hoover, a hack and refuses to apologize. Then, she learns Ms. Hoover's private pain.
Odd couple Skinner and Chalmers embark on an 800-mile car ride to Cincinnati to attend an administrator's convention - but can they reach their destination without killing each other first -.
Bart becomes a voiceover actor and Comic Book Guy is humiliated at Comic-Con. Meanwhile, Lisa is set up for a fall.
Grampa is accused of a crime. Meanwhile, Kent Brockman questions his career.
When Marge and the kids take a seaside vacation, Homer is unwittingly tempted by a British femme fatale.
Don't miss the annual terror-themed trilogy, including a frightening look at the 2020 election, parodies of Pixar and Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse and a ninth birthday Lisa just can't get over.
Lisa stays home from school to explore the wonders of Western art. She appears as Lisanardo, while Bart takes the shape of a French impressionist, Homer and Marge as Diego Rivera and Frida Kahlo, and Maggie as a warrior Cupid.
At a museum exhibit of Ancient Rome, Marge and Homer get into an argument about Homer's lack of ambition. They then imagine a Roman version of what would happen if Homer was more career-driven.
Mr. Burns goes undercover as "Fred" at the nuclear power plant and becomes friends with Homer and the gang. Burns implements all sorts of amenities to improve his employees' lives, but a jealous Smithers plots to bring the old, bitter Burns back and destroy Fred.
After the Simpsons' dog bites Marge, the family explores the tragic past of Santa's Little Helper.
Lisa makes a new friend who loves horses, but then becomes part of a circle of snooty young rich girls. Meanwhile, Homer takes Marge on a romantic cruise.
In Michigan, Reverend Lovejoy uncovers the reason why Bode left and came to Springfield. When the congregation learns of his crime, they must decide whether to banish their new priest.
When Bode, a young charismatic new preacher, comes to town and shakes things up at church, Reverend Lovejoy investigates his mysterious past.
Cletus becomes a helium tycoon. Meanwhile, Marge reunites with baby Hudson from Playdate with Destiny.
When Maggie goes to pre-school, Marge decides to get a job to pass the time and ends up working at an upscale weed dispensary. Then, Homer decides to open his own dispensary that mimics a sketchy drug deal, putting their two businesses at odds.
Bart bonds with Ned Flanders, which leaves Homer jealous, so he retaliates by mentoring Nelson Muntz. Then, a heroic act by Homer makes Bart look up to him again.
Marge implements a screen time limit for the whole family, all of whom all easily adjust to the new lifestyle. However, Marge realizes that she is the one addicted - not her husband and children -.
Bart accidentally sees a brand-new superhero movie a month before it comes out.. and the world cowers before his newfound plot-spoiling powers. Thus, a new super-villain is born: Spoiler Boy! Can heroic movie executives stop Bart before he succumbs to the temptations of ultimate evil? Find out.
Homer and Marge compete to be the topic of Lisa's "Most Interesting Person I Know" essay. Lisa instead chooses Professor Frink. While Lisa works on the essay, Frink develops a cryptocurrency, overtaking Mr. Burn's title of richest man in Springfield. With new fame, Frink struggles to know who his real friends are, while Mr. Burns schemes to take his title back.
The sea captain finds a treasure he's been searching for all his life, but it's taken from him by the townspeople. Marge convinces the people of Springfield to build a S.T.E.M. school with the money.
Homer and Marge attend Artie Ziff's wedding and become quite uncomfortable when they realize that his bride-to-be is a clone of Marge. Meanwhile, Lisa grapples with the misogynistic implications of the immediate popularity she receives after getting her new Invisalign braces.
Sideshow Bob gets contracted as this year's mall Santa. Meanwhile, someone is stealing all the Christmas packages off people's front porches.
In this Flanders family-focused episode, Todd blames God for the death of his mother and rejects his faith – causing great distress for Ned, who sends him to live with the Simpsons in an attempt to scare him back into God's arms. Blackboard: 'Idle hands are the devil's tool'.
In a special Thanksgiving edition of "Treehouse of Horror," the Simpsons are forced to face various Thanksgiving nightmares, including the first Thanksgiving, an A.I. mishap and a dangerous space mission complicated by a sentient cranberry sauce.
The Simpsons join other Springfield families on the Van Houten's annual trip to Costa Rica, which they obviously can't afford. While there, Homer befriends Patty's new girlfriend, Evelyn, and Lisa tracks down the real reason the Van Houtens can go on this trip every year.
When Marge realizes that everyone views her as boring, she takes up competitive lumber-jacking as a hobby (and has a real gift for it). The circuit of competitive timbersports takes her on a month-long retreat to Portland with her trainer, Paula, whom Homer worries is going to steal her away forever. Blackboard: 'Daylight savings isn't something I can spend'.
After a trip to Aquatraz Water Park, Lisa becomes determined to set free Springfield's most vicious animals in captivity. Meanwhile, Homer fulfills a lifelong dream of buying a boat, and quickly realizes boat ownership sucks.
The 30th Treehouse of Horror features a demon Maggie, a mission to rescue Milhouse from another dimension, dead-Homer's spirit trying on some new bodies for size and Selma finally finding love in an unlikely place – the alien in the basement.
During the San Castellanta street festival, much of the town realizes their wallets have been pickpocketed. After the state investigator puts the wrong man in jail, Chief Wiggum sets out to clear his name, catch the real criminal and show he's still up for police work.
Homer is demoted to supervising interns, among whom is go-getter millennial Mike, a 35-year-old who asks Homer to be his mentor. However, when Homer inspires Mike to start a business of his own, the two find themselves being chased by the mob.
When a video of Bart and Homer fighting goes viral, they begin a journey as social media celebrities. Meanwhile, Lisa battles the school's new industrialized detention system.
After Homer's work cuts children's healthcare benefits, Marge turns to buying healing crystals as a cheaper solution for Bart's ADD. Bart begins to succeed in school, prompting Marge to open her very own crystals empire and sell to the naive mothers at school
When the secret stack of cash – aka Lisa's college fund – Marge keeps under the sink goes missing, the documentary crime series "Deadline Springfield" goes in-depth to solve the case, leaving no stone unturned.
On a family vacation to Niagara Falls, Lisa is mistakenly granted political asylum in Canada. When Marge goes to rescue Lisa, they are forced to re-evaluate their love for America as they navigate the polite Canadian landscape. Meanwhile, Homer takes Maggie to a "Daddy and Me" class. Blackboard: 'HAW Haw' (Bart flips it, Nelson duct taped to other side)
Marge becomes Director of Springfield's local theater, armed with Lisa's script resembling "Hamilton." Meanwhile, Homer joins a baby class with Maggie, where he takes a liking to supervisor Chloe
Lisa is scouted by the director of the Capitol City Philharmonic, to her band teacher's dismay. Homer works extra shifts at the plant so Lisa can play, putting strain on the family. Blackboard: 'I am not a Grandmother'.
Krusty releases an all-female reboot of "Itchy and Scratchy," so Bart and his crew of all-male friends decide to boycott the show. After Bart's friends turn on him for laughing at the reboot, Bart joins a woke group of sixth-grade girls who commit crimes against patriarchy.
As Bart begins to excel in video game competitions, Homer discovers a passion for coaching him. Lisa attempts to bring Homer back to reality, but the plan causes chaos.
When a romantic night ends in injury, Marge recovers by taking up kiteboarding while Homer bonds with his hallucinated hernia. Lisa attempts to fix her parents' strained relationship by seeking advice from an unlikely source.
After Homer steals Comic Book Guy's car, he must either prove his innocence in court or reconcile with the jilted nerd. Blackboard: 'Chili fires do not go in like a lamb and out like a lion'.
Krusty reveals the untold story of his past in his movie "The Sands of Space." While working as personal assistants on the movie, Bart and Lisa learn about the early years of their parents' relationship.
Homer angers Marge by binging their favorite show without her, and has to pick up a new skill in order to make amends. Meanwhile, Bart prepares to compete in "Krusty's Holiday Trample".
When Lisa spots a new best friend from the window of the bus, she gets a taste of what life could be like with a different, more cultured family, and proceeds to try and live a double life.
When Marge and Homer leave Grampa to babysit the kids, some little green army men trigger a PTSD episode, sending the family on a journey to Grampa's past to when he was a post-war toy model.
After a failed Black Friday shopping spree, Marge is determined to fix Christmas. However, Homer and the kids surprise Marge with a vacation to a Florida resort. Blackboard: 'The fat man who works one night a year is my dad'.
Lisa and Homer's bond gets stronger when they start spending real quality time together, and Bart feels neglected. So Marge tries to help Homer balance his attention between the kids.
Homer finds his calling as a TV recapper, but his harsh grading causes a brawl with Krusty. After almost killing Homer, Krusty hides out at a real circus, and finds happiness there.
Marge wants a job, and stumbles into becoming a plastic food storage container-selling drag queen. Meanwhile, Lisa tries to make the world better in the style of "Amelie"
On a mission to play hardcore pranks, Bart, Nelson and Milhouse get Moe a mail-order bride on the Dark Web.
A self-driving car company comes to Springfield, poaching all of the power plant employees with its fun work environment.
Homer wins an oyster-eating contest against the mythical Cthulhu, Springfield is overrun by plant body-snatchers, Lisa finally snaps and Mr. Burns opens a retirement home with some Jurassic upgrades.
God and St. Peter contemplate what merits a soul getting into heaven, while citizens of Springfield remember their divine encounters.
Marge and Homer's marriage is tested when they travel to a tropical island to compete for a million dollars on Marge's favorite reality competition show.
Bart takes a dare, and ends up in the hospital. To cover for himself and Homer, he says he went to Heaven and met Jesus. Christian producers offer the Simpsons a movie deal, which Homer takes. But Bart can't deal with the guilt and comes clean to Marge after the movie is finished.
After getting struck by lightning, Bart receives visits from ghosts, who want closure only he can provide.
After receiving an insurance payout, the Simpsons go to Denmark, so Grampa can benefit from the country's free healthcare.
Homer gets Flanders a job at the plant, and he soon learns that no good deed goes unpunished when Flanders starts to insist on carpools and demands more from Homer's work performance. Meanwhile, Marge feels as though their marriage has lost its spark.
Grampa makes a confession to Homer while on his deathbed. After his recovery, he comes to realize that this issue will not be easy to reconcile.
When the Simpsons' flight to Gainesville gets re-routed to New Orleans, Lisa is forced to face her failures, and regain her confidence as a jazz musician. Meanwhile, Bart is intrigued by the voodoo in Louisiana, and Homer is intrigued by the drinking.
Homer and Marge follow Moe after the bar closes early and discover him and his father fighting. The Simpsons, after finding out that Moe has been excommunicated from his family for years, attempt to bring them back together.
In an attempt to bring the family together, Marge forces everyone to hand in their electronics and take a trip to a book store. Blackboard: 'April Showers did not date the president'.
Bart goes to prankster rehab after a clown-mask prank terrifies the town and destroys Krusty's career. A tortured Krusty then tries his hand at serious drama with a regional theater company.
Homer and Marge recount the story of their transition from loving their life without kids to being miserable parents.
When Homer is accused of stealing a million-dollar painting, only a detective from the 1970s can clear his name, or send him to jail. It's a classic impossible mystery.
Fearing that the end of the world is near, Mr. Burns tasks Dr. Frink with testing all of Springfield to determine who is worth saving. The results shake the Simpson family to their core. Blackboard: features Bart watching Homer assigned to write 'Strangling is not an effective parenting tool'.
When the Simpsons go to a STEM conference, Lisa falls for a crooning jazz pianist named Brendan. Meanwhile, Bart discovers that he has an affinity for chemistry.
When Bart goes missing, the town puts together a search party to find him. After most give up hope, Sideshow Bob manipulates Millhouse into revealing where Bart is hiding. Blackboard 'Snow Angels are not frozen Hobos'.
As future Lisa writes her college application essay for Harvard, she recalls past disappointing birthdays that helped shape her.
Homer and the guys reunite their old bowling team to cheer up Moe, only to end up in fierce competition with a team of arrogant millionaires. Meanwhile, Lisa and Marge try to teach Bart that money isn't everything. Blackboard: 'We do not live in our own pee'. (underwater title sequence)
Frustrated with the local government, Marge decides to run for Mayor. To win public support, she begins making Homer the butt of her jokes. Blackboard: 'I will not ask my guidance counselor why he couldn't get a better job'.
Grampa gets a hearing aid and finally hears what everyone has been saying about him. Meanwhile, Mr. Skinner discovers that his mother has kept the ultimate secret from him. Blackboard: 'Hooligan is not a profession'.
Maggie becomes possessed by an ancient demon, Lisa discovers a creepy/perfect version of her family in an alternate universe and Homer cannibalizes himself.
Homer discovers that Maggie is a whistling savant and launches her baby-celebrity career. Meanwhile, Marge impresses Fat Tony with her interior design taste, and he hires her to style his brothel.
Marge and Lisa turn Lisa's sad experience into a successful graphic novel-turned-Broadway show, but they struggle with creative differences and ego.
In a magical medieval world, Marge's mother is turned into an Ice Walker and the only way for Homer to afford the cure is to force Lisa to use illegal magic. When the King discovers this, he kidnaps Lisa, and Homer must lead a feudal uprising to save her.
When Homer's court case determines that a dog's life is more valuable than a human's is, the status of man's best friend rises in Springfield. When the dogs recognize their new position of power, they assert their dominance over the humans.
Homer and Marge attempt to work on their marriage, not knowing that Mr. Burns and Nigel have a bet on whether Nigel can break them apart. With the successful, albeit unconventional, help of Moe, the couple gets back their mojo.
Bart gets in trouble on Grandparents Day at school and is forced to hang out with Skinner's mother as punishment. After spending time with various grandmas in the neighborhood, he learns the benefits of hanging out with the elderly, but eventually recognizes the dangers of taking advantage of them. Meanwhile, Peekimon Get has taken over the town of Springfield.
Disappointed in Yale, Mr. Burns decides to start his own for-profit university and Homer is hired as a professor.
Worried that Bart is destined for failure, Marge turns to a series of parenting "experts" for advice. Homer decides to cash in on one expert's advice by opening up a trophy store in Springfield. Meanwhile, Bart finds some needed encouragement from Grampa, who gives him a precious watch coveted by Homer.
In this parody of a cable sports show, Bart goes from delinquent with detention to the star basketball player at Springfield Elementary. Lisa covers Bart's success for the school paper, and Homer becomes the team's coach. Things go awry when Bart gets involved with the mafia.
When Bart and Lisa return home abruptly after a traumatic incident at Kamp Krustier, they put an end to Homer and Marge's romantic encounters. Without sex to distract him, Homer becomes a more productive worker and caring husband, but Marge misses the old Homer. Then, Bart and Lisa return to camp to confront the source of their trauma. Blackboard: 'We're the only house where the Christmas tree is still up'.
When Bart betrays Lisa, he has to deal with his guilt – literally. Meanwhile, Springfield is in awe when Homer is revealed to be a chess savant.
When all the fast food restaurants in Springfield become healthy, Homer turns to the last bastion of greasy food for comfort; Lisa must find a good news story when her school radio station is in jeopardy. Blackboard: 'If we're so good at predicting how come my dad bet on Atlanta'.
Mr. Burns tries to relive his glory days, and crosses paths with a mysterious music mogul. After being conned by him and reduced to bankruptcy, Mr. Burns seeks revenge on the music producer with the help of Homer, Bart, rapper Jazzy James and the mogul's ex-wife, Praline. Also, Lisa is courted by the richest kid in town, Smithers begins a perilous journey and Marge opens an obscure boutique
Mr. Burns tries to relive his glory days, and crosses paths with a mysterious music mogul. After being conned by him and reduced to bankruptcy, Mr. Burns seeks revenge on the music producer with the help of Homer, Bart, rapper Jazzy James and the mogul's ex-wife, Praline. Also, Lisa is courted by the richest kid in town, Smithers begins a perilous journey and Marge opens an obscure boutique store.
When Marge becomes obsessed with a Japanese style of living, the Simpsons must part with any item that no longer brings them joy. For Homer, this means finding a new home for the family pig. For Lisa, it means saying goodbye to her beloved sax.
Krusty tries to impress his daughter as they spend Christmas with the Simpsons. Meanwhile, Reverend Lovejoy seeks converts after church attendance plummets, and Maggie is haunted by a spooky Christmas toy.
A workplace accident leaves Homer in a cast, and in a position to sue Mr. Burns. This leaves Marge unfulfilled, so she turns to an unexpected source for romance. Meanwhile, Lisa is made "Bus Monitor" and tries to keep the peace.
Homer finds a new app that makes his life much easier and outsources his father-son bonding. Meanwhile, Grampa finds that he is about to be a father again. Blackboard: 'I will watch all 600 episodes without sleeping'.
When the Retirement Castle and the V.A. Hospital can't solve Grampa's health issues, the Simpsons decide to take a family trip to Cuba to get him cheap medical care. Blackboard: 'Being right sucks'.
Homer gets roped into coaching the kids' lacrosse team with Milhouse's dad, Kirk, who is in desperate need of a friend. When Kirk gets too clingy, Homer vents about how much of a loser he is. Kirk overhears his rant and disappears, right when the team needs him most: the championship game.
Lisa and Bart investigate Krusty's suspicious new "Krustaceans" candy. Meanwhile, Homer wants a promotion at the nuclear plant and asks Marge to help him dress the part, and news anchor Kent Brockman struggles to find his feet in the changing media world. Blackboard: 'The first episode of the second 600'.
In the midst of a major drought, Mr. Burns introduces a Hunger Games-style contest in which Springfield's children fight each other for a day in Burns' personal reservoir. Meanwhile, Lisa's imaginary best friend, Rachel, is jealous of Lisa's real best friends and starts killing them. Moe tells Bart that the barflies are actually covert agents and that he wants Bart join their team in Homer's place.
After Homer catches Bart rooting for Springfield's football rival, the Boston Americans, he plans a family "hate-cation" trip to Boston in an attempt to show Bart that Boston is a terrible city.
Mr. Burns hires the Simpsons to play his live-in virtual reality family, but excludes Homer so that he may play dad. Now alone, Homer finds a new best friend in girl-next-door Julia, who eats, drinks and thinks like him. Blackboard: 'I will stop losing 50% of my NFL lead-in'.
When Springfield is burned to the ground, the Simpsons beg Mr. Burns to fund its rebuilding. Burns agrees – with one condition: he gets to put on a variety show at the Springfield Bowl. Blackboard: 'This arm needs Tommy John surgery'.
When Marge gets arrested for letting Bart go to the park unsupervised, she serves time only to realize that prison is a welcome break from the demands of her life as a mom and wife. In her absence, Homer struggles to manage all of the parenting responsibilities that Marge usually handles. Blackboard: 'Milhouse does not live below the puberty line'.
After butchering a speech in front of all of his friends at work, Homer turns to improv comedy to gain back his confidence in his public speaking skills. Meanwhile, Marge decides to rebuild Bart's lackluster treehouse, but tensions rise when Bart questions her building skills. Also, in the episode's last three minutes, Homer appears live for the first time on television (both for East and West Coast broadcasts) to answer fan questions.
After promising Marge the trip of a lifetime, frugality gets the better of Homer when he makes a deal with a travel agent to be a courier of a top-secret briefcase in exchange for a discounted family vacation to Paris. Blackboard: 'Dirty clothes are not a Mother's Day gift'.
Homer recalls a tense family vacation to the Grand Canyon with the Flanders family. At first, the Flanders' perfection puts the families at odds, but when they get stranded and Ned and Bart go for help, the families finally bond. Blackboard: 'Dad swears he'll get his taxes in soon'.
After getting into an argument, Marge takes Lisa on a touristy trip to Capital City, where, after attending a musical, they meet the show's star, Andrew Rannells (guest-voicing as himself), who reminds Lisa how lucky she is to have such a great mom. Meanwhile, Bart is frustrated that everyone expects his pranks, so he teams up with Maggie to trick people. Blackboard: Features Principal Skinner writing 'Never loose a bet to Bart Simpson' while Bart watches.
When Smithers is devastated by Burns' lack of affection towards him, Homer makes it his mission to find him a boyfriend. Meanwhile, after Bart orchestrates the removal of the lead in the school's stage production of "Casablanca," Milhouse serves as a terrible understudy, which frustrates his co-star, Lisa.
Not feeling unique, Lisa signs up for the Mars One Space Colony – to Marge's dismay. Then, Marge hires Bart to go through the tryout process with Lisa to make her want to quit.
After performing CPR on a tased raccoon, Lisa discovers her calling to be veterinarian and becomes an intern at the local office, but learns a tough lesson when her neglected class hamster dies. Meanwhile, Marge moonlights as a crime scene cleaner for a little extra money, and the trauma of the gory scenes make her increasingly dead inside.
After Bart accidentally sends a sweet homeless woman's cart into the river, he allows her to live in his closet for a small fee. When Lisa discovers that the woman is an incredible folk singer, she offers her own closet and plans a concert, only to be disappointed by Hettie's surprising substance abuse and violent nature. Meanwhile Homer tries to prove he's handy, but accidentally traps the cat in the walls of the house.
Lonely Professor Fink uses science to turn himself into a man whom women find attractive. Then, overwhelmed by the attention, he invents an algorithm to perfectly pair the lonely men and women of Springfield, realizing that scientific exploration is his true love. Meanwhile, Marge, Bart, and Lisa visit Grampa for Valentine's Day and try to rescue the old folks from a drug-induced hallucination that allows them to relive their happiest memories.
Sanjay passes his stake in the Kwik-E-Mart to his millennial son, Jay, who turns it into a hip, health food market against Apu's insistence on tradition. Bart, whom Homer had convinced to give up pranking, is called upon to return to his trickster life and take down the new store.
A new teacher at Springfield Elementary, and a captivated Bart tries everything to win her over. Meanwhile, Homer decides to buy a new brand of "milk," which causes early puberty, both for Bart (augmenting his wooing powers) and Lisa (whose small bout with acne opens her up to the world of makeup and popularity).
After a photo Marge posts on social media gets Homer fired, he returns to the best job he ever had, a dishwasher at a Greek restaurant. This same post inspires Lisa to code an app that predicts the real-life consequences of anything you post online, only to create sentient artificial intelligence.
Bart's coming of age story, a la "Boyhood," chronicles his life from six years old to his time as an accomplished young man. Along the way, his tense relationship with Homer, an overly uncaring version of himself, and Lisa, who overshadows him in every way possible, shape Bart more than he realizes.
Lisa sets out to restore the tarnished reputation of Springfield's first female inventor. To find her invention, she scours an abandoned asylum and a restaurant that caters to men. Bart joins Lisa at the asylum, stealing one of the homicidal patient's notebooks, and bragging to the boys at school that he wrote the entries himself. This revelation causes Homer and Marge to believe he is a sociopath, which Bart decides to use to his advantage until things go too far.
When Homer loses $5,000 at a poker game with Broadway legend Laney Fontaine, the only way he is able to settle the bet is if he loans Lisa to Laney for a month. Then, Laney turns Lisa into a show biz kid and Marge and Homer fear they made a mistake letting her go. So they head to New York to get her back.
Lisa befriends Harper, a new kid at school who happens to be super-rich. Then, Homer befriends Harper's dad and is able to enjoy the perks of Lisa having a rich friend, as well. But Lisa decides that Harper is a bully and moves to end the friendship, which prompts Homer to try and smooth things over so he can continue to enjoy the good life.
In the annual fright fest Halloween episode, Sideshow Bob finally kills Bart, only to reanimate him; Homerzilla terrorizes the Springfield Prefecture; and Lisa and Milhouse get super powers from radiation.
When Lisa becomes scared at the Krustyland Halloween Horror Night, Homer is forced to take down his Everscream Terrors decorations. Halloween pop-up employees seek vengeance on Homer for causing them to lose their jobs, and rob his house while Homer and Lisa hide out in the attic. Homer and Lisa light up their stored holiday decorations to attract attention and stand up to the intruders.
Upon learning that their father really died of lung cancer, Selma and Patty agree to quit smoking. When Selma relapses, an angry Patty moves in with Marge and Homer.
Scotty Boom, a Chew Network super-chef, challenges Homer to a smoke-off. But when someone steals Homer's secret weapon - a smoker he bought off a mysterious man at a BBQ shack - Lisa and Bart are on the case.
In the season 27 premiere, Marge and Homer split up--and this time it looks like it's for good. Homer takes up with a young pharmacist named Candace, but he misses Marge.
When a modernized Springfield Elementary has a technical meltdown, Lisa transforms it into a Waldorf school. Meanwhile, Groundskeeper Willie becomes the coach of the mathletes.
After Bart gets bullied at the school dance, Marge convinces the town to pass anti-bullying legislation. Homer then gets arrested and sent to rehab for bullying Ned Flanders, only to subsequently leave rehab as a hero.
The Simpsons learn about Grampa's days in the Air Force, and Bart takes up smoking to impress Milhouse's Dutch cousin, Annika,.
When Homer gets an old film roll developed, the family takes a trip down memory lane to see the origins of how Bart and Lisa first started fighting with each other. Blackboard: 'I will not pay my sister to do my punishment'.
Bart lies about being involved in a bulldozer crash, so Marge decides to follow him everywhere until he confesses. Meanwhile, Homer ignores Santa's Little Helper when Flanders gets a new dog.
When Duffman undergoes hip replacement surgery and retires, the company sets up a reality show competition to find his replacement. Homer wins the competition, and because the job requires him to stay sober, he learns that beer isn't as necessary as he thought to have a good time.
Chief Wiggum is mistakenly delivered a military jet pack, which he gleefully accepts and uses in order to fight crime. But when the jet pack crashes into the church, the congregation, led by Marge, must resort to gambling and counting cards in order to collect money to repair the church.
Homer is put in charge of keeping Princess Kemi out of trouble while her father, a Nigerian king, works out a uranium deal with Mr. Burns. When Kemi ends up at Moe's, Moe jumps to the conclusion that she must be related to the Nigerian prince who scammed him over email and schemes to get his money back. But much to his surprise, he finds himself falling for the princess.
When Marge gets fed up with the thankless duty of chauffeuring her kids around, she begins working as a driver for a transportation app service. Meanwhile, Homer bankrupts Moe when he watches over the bar for one night, which forces Moe to take a temporary job as a janitor at the nuclear plant. Blackboard: 'Pixel art is not real art'.
When Lisa learns Springfield's anthem was stolen from another town she writes a replacement. Meanwhile, Homer learns the meaning of "Wide Pride".
When inventor Elon Musk lands in Springfield, he and Homer become fast friends and revolutionize the town's nuclear plant. But when Musk goes overboard and Mr. Burns wants him removed, Homer must figure out a way to break up with him.
Bart has a new accomplice and best friend when Homer is hypnotized at the circus and believes he is a young boy again. Blackboard: 'Snowmen don't have carrot penises'.
During a trip to "Dizzneeland" the Simpsons board the wrong ride, Rocket To Your Doom, and are transported through the galaxy to Kang and Kodos' home planet, where they are held captive at the local zoo and the inhabitants decide to eat Homer.
It looks like Homer won't be home for Christmas after he stays too long at Moe's Tavern on Christmas Eve and an irate Marge tells him not to return to their house, so he's left to wander alone around Springfield and lament the effects of Christmas spirits. Blackboard 'Reindeer meat does not taste like chicken'.
Homer has a mid-life crisis, takes up bass guitar and forms a cover band with some of the other dads in town. But the band's modest early success is soon overwhelmed by the breakout potential of their most unlikely star, Apu.
Bart faces a tough test at school when he gets a new teacher, Mr. Lassen, who vows to crush his spirit.
In a special crossover episode, "Futurama's" Planet Express crew comes to present-day Springfield to prevent the Simpsons from destroying the future.
Lisa brings in Assemblywoman Maxine Lombard to put a stop to Mr. Burns' fracking operation, but is taken aback when the two political opponents find themselves attracted to one another.
"Treehouse of Horror XXV" is the 25th installment in the Treehouse of Horror series.
-In this Halloween special, Bart and Lisa go to hell and become demons. (This short is titled school in hell.)
-Moe's "Clockwork Orange"-style gang is disrupted when Dum (Homer) falls in love with a girl (Marge).
-And, in a parody of The Others, the Simpsons are haunted by a family of ghosts, which turn out the be the family from the shorts, who were murdered and buried in the house.
Marge opens a sandwich franchise store after her sandwiches become a huge hit at Springfield Elementary. But running day-to-day at the store proves challenging, especially when the same franchise opens another location across the street.
When Bart disrespects Homer's authority, Homer makes a point to try his hand at parenting. This proves fruitless, so Marge signs them up for the Relation Ship, where they'll resolve their conflicts at sea. Meanwhile, Marge is in charge of Homer's fantasy football league, but manages to win despite being the underdog.
In the milestone 26th season opener of THE SIMPSONS, the unthinkable happens: a Springfield resident dies. Also, Krusty retires after he's offended by a comedy cable channel roast of him, and Lisa tries to protect Homer from getting hurt. Blackboard: 'Spoiler Alert: Unfortunately my dad doesn't die'.
Bart is plagued with guilt when he wins the annual "Race Around the School," with an assist from Nelson, who beats up frontrunner Milhouse. Meanwhile, Homer tries to bring back the annual 4th of July fireworks display after it's canceled for budget reasons. Guest voice Glenn Close returns as Mona Simpson and Olympian Edwin Moses guest-voices as himself.
Marge swears off befriending any more couples when Homer offends their charming new British neighbors. But when Lisa declares that she, too, doesn't need friends, Marge reconsiders.
Homer wakes up in a world where his family and everyone in Springfield are made of Legos. Can he "put together" how he got there, and figure out how to get home before he's stuck in a world of bricks forever? Find out.
Bart can't stand art class. So he makes a voodoo doll of his art teacher. But when his spell makes her pregnant instead, he becomes a savior to Springfield couples trying to conceive. Then, he's kidnapped to help conceive a thoroughbred race horse. Blackboard 'You can't play April Fool's jokes on April 27th'.
Set in the future, Homer has a new clone for every time he dies. Lisa is married to a zombie version of Milhouse, while Bart deals with custody issues with his ex-wife, Jenda. Each defines what love means to them.
Marge is concerned that Lisa is dating below her station when she brings home competitive eater-in-training Lucas Bortner, and she enlists Homer to help Lisa explore other options. Meanwhile, Bart is thrilled to receive free gifts from Snake Jailbird after he helps the convict escape from a jam, but when a betrayal from Milhouse puts Snake back in jail, Bart must forge a plan to set him free.
Homer is recruited as a World Cup referee after Lisa extolls his integrity on the youth soccer field in a Springfield Elementary speech contest. But when the Simpsons travel to Brazil, Homer finds his honesty tested by one of South America's slickest gangsters in the soccer match-bribing business.
After Lisa's new pet guinea pig destroys the Simpsons' living room art, Marge falls in love with a beautiful painting at the Van Houten's yard sale, which Homer snaps up for 20 bucks. But, when Lisa reveals it's by a famous early 20th century painter and could be worth $100,000, Marge and Homer face a dilemma: split the money with the Van Houtens, or keep the cash as a "cushion" for their kids.
Marge invites Grampa and two other octogenarians to live at the Simpsons' house after the Retirement Castle is closed for health violations, but she quickly becomes frustrated with Homer when he starts embracing the "old person lifestyle." Meanwhile, at Springfield Elementary, Bart defends Nelson's affinity for hand-me-down underwear, leading Nelson to befriend Bart. Blackboard 'My Dad's already drunk for St. Patrick's'.
On a research trip, Lisa is shocked to discover that Sideshow Bob is now the chief scientist at a massive chemical engineering company, but her fears are allayed as she becomes enamored with his likeminded appreciation of high-culture. Meanwhile, Marge's attempt to preach healthy sexual practices to a teen church group goes awry.
Bart is rescued from a confrontation with Springfield Elementary's bullies by Diggs, a recent transfer student and aspiring champion in the niche sport of falconry. But, Bart soon discovers that Diggs wants to do more than just wrangle falcons: he wants to take to the sky himself.
Mr. Burns gives high-tech eyeglasses to all of his employees in order to spy on them. Homer loves the enhanced reality of his new gadget - that is, until Marge tries them on and he finds out she's seeing a marriage counselor. Meanwhile, Bart takes a stand against buying Nelson a Valentine's Day card, despite buying one for every other kid in class, and Nelson delivers him an ultimatum: find him the best Valentine's Day gift ever or be fed to the classroom electric pencil sharpener.
Comic Book Guy realizes his comics are nothing if he can't share them with anyone. Then he meets Kumiko, a Japanese woman writing an autobiographical manga, and he seeks out Homer's advice on how to date her, ending happily for everyone. Blackboard: 'If you haven't broken your Christmas presents yet, you're not trying'.
Homer becomes annoyed with movie theaters, so Bart teaches him how to download movies illegally. Homer is delighted with his discovery of free movies until he's caught for piracy.
Springfield is inundated with holiday revelers after the nuclear power plant springs a radiation leak, causing snow to fall all over town. When the tourists drive up Christmas shopping prices, Marge opens up the Simpsons' house to boarders. Blackboard: 'I will not call my teacher "prancer" and "vixen".'.
Principal Skinner promises the students that the best-behaved among them can take a ride in a submarine. When Skinner gives all the kids a clean slate, Bart believes even his own past indiscretions will be forgotten if he doesn't get into any more trouble. Meanwhile Lisa tries to help a cash-poor Krusty to turn things around by suggesting he sell the foreign rights to his shows. Blackboard: 'I will stop asking when Santa goes to the bathroom'.
Lisa finally makes a new best friend, Isabel Gutierrez, only to discover that she's a Republican and her opponent in the campaign for second grade class representative. Also guest-voicing is Anderson Cooper as himself.
Homer remembers his Lamaze skills when he's forced to deliver a baby in an elevator. When the mother names the child Homer Jr., he quickly develops a deep emotional bond with the kid. Meanwhile, Lisa is recruited by the cheerleaders of the local pro football team, the Springfield Atoms. Blackboard: 'Rocktober is not followed by blowvember'.
Marge encourages Homer to embrace his "You-Only-Live-Once" spirit by inviting an old pen pal to stay with him and cross items off of his "to-do" list from when he was a 10-year old. Meanwhile, Lisa institutes a new honor code at Springfield Elementary. Blackboard: 'My school schedule does not include a bye week'.
Four Springfielders are prompted to try to right past regrets following the funeral of a beloved neighbor. Homer regrets selling his Apple stock to buy a bowling ball, Marge worries she caused Bart's rebellious streak, Mr. Burns reminisces about a romance he gave up with a beautiful Parisian woman and Kent Brockman admits he was too afraid to leave local news and follow his former partner Rachel Maddow to cable news. Blackboard: 'We'll really miss you mrs. K.'
The opener of the 24th annual "Treehouse of Horror" is from Guillermo del Toro and features monsters and classic characters from horror films throughout history. In "Oh The Places You'll D'oh," the first of three spine-tingling stories, Homer rides around Springfield wreaking havoc as "The Fat in The Hat" in a rhyming Dr. Seuss-ian tale. In "Dead and Shoulders," Bart is beheaded during a kite accident, his head is attached to Lisa's body and they must live together as one. The final terrifying tale, "Freaks no Geeks," features Mr. Burns' traveling circus, The Burnsum and Bailey Circus, which has stopped in Springfieldland in the 1930s. Trapeze artist Marge and Strong Man Homer are performers and things go awry when circus freak Moe starts to make advances towards Marge.
In a nod to the hit cable series "Homeland," Lisa suspects Homer may have been "turned" when he returns a changed man from a nuclear power plant operating convention. So she enlists the services of Annie, an intense, jumpy FBI agent to help her unravel the truth.
Marge unwittingly gets involved with a Web site for married people seeking affairs, and meets a charming man (voice of Seth MacFarlane) who takes quite an interest in her.
Homer, Moe, Lenny and Carl win $200,000 in the Springfield Lottery. But when Carl takes off to Iceland - his homeland - with all the winnings, the guys embark on a Nordic adventure to get the cash back. Then, Marge mistakes a swinging Ashley Madison-type website for a Dolly Madison-type cupcake site, not realizing it's a destination for married people seeking liaisons. On the site, she meets the charming "Ben", who pursues her after they learn they share a love for a "Downton Abbey"-type TV series.
Marge encourages Bart to explore his creative side, and his initial reticence quickly subsides when Marge hires Slava's beautiful daughter, Zhenya, as his new piano instructor. Meanwhile, Homer is shocked when he loses the last two remaining hairs on his head, and employs a wide variety of headgear to try and keep his newfound baldness a secret from Marge.
Moe finds a new lease on life when rich venture capitalists take an interest in his homemade whiskey. Then, Grampa injures himself while babysitting Bart, and quickly discovers he prefers being cared for by his grandson than the staff at the nursing home. Also, Lisa takes exception to a "Tupac-at-Coachella"-style hologram of jazz legend Bleeding Gums Murphy and Sonny Rollins appears to ask her not to boycott the record label.
Homer is recruited to be a church deacon by the trendy new reverend in town. But Bart asks Flanders to help him track down their former pastor, Reverend Lovejoy, when Homer starts to embrace the faith a little too seriously. Meanwhile, Marge finds out her dry cleaners mistakenly swapped her wedding dress with one of Krusty's costumes.
Once again, Homer must save his marriage when Marge gets fed up with his behavior. Meanwhile, after watching "A Streetcar Named Desire," Milhouse takes on a Marlon Brando-inspired bad-boy persona to attract Lisa.
Bart is falsely accused of pulling a prank on Easter involving the school marching band and stuffing rotten eggs in the brass section's horns, and Lisa must step in as his attorney to defend her brother. Meanwhile, Mr. Burns attempts to fulfill his lifelong dream of becoming a superhero, Fruit Bat Man,.
Flanders becomes jealous when his laid-back parents start to prefer Homer's company over his and he faces unbearable guilt after punching Homer in the eye, as he desperately tries to reconcile with him. Meanwhile, Lisa is distressed by her new substitute teacher, who bullies her for no apparent reason. Blackboard: 'Sorry I broke the blackboard'.
Homer's obsession with the TV show "Storage Battles" leads the family to discover Grampa's past identity as "Gorgeous Godfrey," the most feared, villainous man in pro-wrestling history. What's more, he was once revered by a young Montgomery Burns who now convinces Grampa to get back in the ring. But when Bart starts to adopt some of his grandfather's former cheating ways, Grampa must reconcile with his past before it's too late.
Bart and Milhouse explore the perks of being an adult when a shaving experiment leaves Milhouse looking exactly like his father, Kirk. Also, Marge desperately tries to save Maggie from the dangers of children's television. Blackboard: 'I will not tweet as the principal's toilet'.
Bart's heart strings are pulled once again when Mary Spuckler returns to Springfield. But his failure to pay her enough attention strains their relationship. Marge, too, puts Homer in the dog house.
After surviving a tornado, Marge and Homer seek out guardians for the kids, in case the worst should happen. They first turn to friends and family, including Homer's half-brother, Herb Powell with whom to entrust their kids, but when Bart and Lisa fall in love with a super-cool couple, Mav and Portia, Marge starts to question their potential guardians' true motivations.
When Springfield Elementary is threatened with closure because of low standardized test scores, the fate of the school rests on one student who missed the test, and who must raise the average above the minimum threshold: Bart Simpson. Meanwhile, Homer finds a parking meter at a local dump, and starts deploying it around Springfield to fleece unwitting parkers of their quarters. Blackboard: 'I will obey oscar campaign rules from now on'.
Homer joins the "Springfield Preppers," an off-the-grid survivalist group whose leader has set up a top-secret retreat outside of town to prepare for the end of the world. But Marge grows skeptical of the group's alarmist shenanigans.
When a fire at the retirement home forces Grampa to move back in with the Simpsons, Homer throws out his back on moving day. While "resting" at home, he gets hooked on the super-addictive tablet game, "Villageville." And, in his distraction, he loses the family dog, Santa's Little Helper. Everyone is angry with Homer for not seeming to care about the missing dog, but Grampa tells them the story of Homer's long-lost childhood pup, Bongo,.
Homer wants a younger, hipper image. So he starts hanging out with Terrence and Emily, his cool new neighbors from Portland, OR. But Marge finds their trendy parenting methods extreme and Bart quickly realizes their son, T-Rex, is super-pretentious.
Lisa tries to cheer up a down-in-the-dumps Homer by winning him a "MyPad" at the school auction. But he falls back into a funk when he breaks the magical tablet device - until Ned Flanders discovers a miracle tree in the Simpsons' backyard with bark that spells the word "HOPE".
Homer is shocked to discover that his bowling teammate Dan Gillick, is an accountant for Fat Tony and his mob. When the government finally catches up with Fat Tony and he is forced to serve time on a jury, he names Dan as his temporary replacement. Meanwhile, Lisa adds insects to her vegetarian diet after passing out during a saxophone solo, but starts questioning her decision when bugs start pleading for mercy in her dreams. Blackboard ' I want to secede but don't know which state I'm in'.
Grampa escapes from his retirement home, and when Homer and Marge frantically try to track him down, they follow clues that reveal secrets in Grampa's past. They find that he worked at a local restaurant with Marvin Hamlish and met and fell in love with the restaurant's singer Rita LaFleur. Meanwhile Lisa tries her hand at online poker, getting tips from the experts, including Jennifer Tilly but is soon gambling with her college fund. Blackboard: 'I will not concede the election until Karl Rove gives me permission'.
When Marge's car falls into a sink hole, she buys the perfect replacement to fit her family of five. But she quickly grows to hate it because, as she tells a shocked Homer, the car would be too small if she wanted to have another baby. Meanwhile Bart and his friends are determined to find out what secret Lisa is keeping when Bart finds her cryptic messages and follows her sneaking off downtown for covert meetings after school.
Destined to be yet another classic Halloween-themed episode of THE SIMPSONS, in the opener of the 23rd annual "Treehouse of Horror," we go back to ancient times when a Mayan Homer and Marge are witnesses to the prediction by ancient calendar makers that 2012 will be the end of the world. In "The Greatest Story Ever Holed," the first of three spine-chilling stories, the Springfield Subatomic Supercollider creates a black hole that terrorizes the city, sucking up everything in its path. Then, in "UNnormal Activity" the Simpsons install cameras all over the house when things start to go bump in the night and Marge discovers it may have to do with an unholy pact she made some years prior. In the final thrilling tale, "Bart & Homer's Excellent Adventure," Bart travels to 1974 to buy a comic book at cover price but inadvertently disrupts Homer and Marge's courtship, leading Marge to end up with Artie Ziff .
America's favorite Midwestern family travels to New York City in search of Bart's long-lost love Mary Spuckler who he wants to reconnect with since she has left Springfield and her hillbilly family there to reinvent herself in the big apple. Lisa and Marge look forward to experiencing all the city has to offer but when they realize their budget won't allow a Broadway play they settle for the free "Shakespeare In the Park" which doesn't go as planned.
Lisa tries to reverse her status as one of the least popular girls in school by ghostwriting positive things about herself on the school blog. When her plan backfires, her social ranking plummets to a new low - until a psychic force tells Lady Gaga that Lisa needs her help. With Gaga's assistance, Lisa and the entire town of Springfield realize that being yourself is better than being like anyone else.
When the town of Springfield discovers that Ned and Edna have secretly gotten hitched, Marge offers to throw them a congratulatory reception. However, bringing everyone together makes them all realize that no marriage is perfect. Meanwhile, Edna tries to help Ned's children become more socially acceptable by changing some of the rules.
After going on "date night" to a spy movie starring crime fighter Stradivarius Cain, Marge becomes upset with Homer for blurting out embarrassing remarks throughout the film, but Homer's attempts to reconcile with Marge do not seem to fix anything. Later, Homer is knocked off a ladder and suffers a concussion on the job, leaving him out of work for six weeks. Instead of telling Marge, Homer decides to use the time to learn how to become a better husband with the help of someone whom he believes is Stradivarius Cain.
When Bart sees a commercial for the ultimate cruise, he begs his parents for a family vacation. Low on cash, the only way they can go is if each family member sells one valuable. Once they're away, Bart is determined to make the vacation last forever. So he comes up with a plan to make sure they never have to return home.
When Bart is forced to chaperone Jimbo's girlfriend to a movie, she ends up developing feelings for him, resulting in a whole bunch of trouble with the bullies at school. Meanwhile, Homer is persuaded to buy a state-of-the-art treadmill, fully equipped with a television. When Lisa shows Homer that he can access television shows wirelessly, he develops an obsession with watching an old television show from the treadmill, but not actually working out, until Marge decides to intervene. Blackboard 'Teacher does not have to pay a "Ugly Tax".
Mr. Burns replaces all of Springfield Power Plant's employees with robots but decides to keep Homer as the sole human worker. With unemployment at an all-time high and mechanical arms operating the workplace, Springfield becomes a dismal and humorless place. But when Homer's machine-programmed peers start to turn on the community and his former real-life employees come to the rescue, they all realize that robots can't replace human friends.
Karma gets the best of Homer after he gets his friends in trouble, and as a result, his bedwetting problem worsens. The family goes on a mission to infiltrate his dreams to search for clues in his subconscious to determine the source of his problem. But just as things take a dangerous turn in the dream, a figure from Homer's past appears, and he is finally reassured that the fond memories of his mother Mona remain alive, giving him just the right amount of reassurance to cure him of his problem.
In order to get back at his dad, Bart goes undercover as a graffiti street artist and plasters Homer's unflattering image all over Springfield. But one night, Bart and Milhouse get caught in the act by established street artists Shepard Fairey, Ron English, Kenny Scharf and Robbie Conal, and to Bart's surprise, they invite him to exhibit his satirical artwork in his very own gallery show. Meanwhile, a hip, new health food superstore opens in Springfield that threatens to put Apu and the Kwik-E-Mart out of business.
The Simpsons are evicted from Springfield and join an off-the-grid community outside of town. But when Homer and Marge try to sneak back into Springfield, they are welcomed with hostility from their former friends and neighbors and begin to appreciate their new and more accepting home.
Marge and Lisa's mother-daughter Valentine's Day plans take a turn when Lisa meets Nick, an intellectual romantic who shares the same passion for culture, history and literature. Lisa and Nick fall head over heels for each other in a fairytale romance and make a secret getaway to Mulberry Island to profess their eternal love. Meanwhile, Bart and Milhouse are inspired by the hosts of "MythCrackers" to "crack" Springfield Elementary's own legends.
After Moe is heckled for not having any real companions, Moe's best friend and beloved bar rag narrates his incredible thousand-year journey to Springfield. Beginning in the Middle Ages, the bar rag was loomed into a beautiful and ornate medieval tapestry and traveled around the globe through the hands of royalty before finding himself found himself at Moe's Tavern. Meanwhile, Bart begs Milhouse for forgiveness after the two friends get into a tiff, and when the bar rag goes missing, Moe realizes that he has more friends than he thought.
As the mastermind and creator of the online social networking phenomenon SpringFace, Lisa is called to trial when Springfield's obsession with the site becomes chaotic and dysfunctional. Lisa recounts her story and explains that she created the site after realizing she had no real friends. But as SpringFace expands and Springfield's fixation with the site causes mass hysteria, Lisa begins to realize that adding thousands of friends online did not compare to having real friendships. Later, Patty and Selma compete against the Winklevoss Twins in the rowing event at the 2012 Olympic Games.
Homer lands his own political talk show after a video featuring his impassioned rant on poor treatment at the airport goes viral. As his talk show quickly gains popularity nationwide, Homer becomes the spokesperson for the Gravy Movement and the voice of America's newest political party. But when ill-informed Homer is asked to select the next Republican nominee for President and officially endorses right-wing rock star Ted Nugent, Marge and Lisa worry that Homer's opinion and influence might be more powerful than he realizes.
It's the most wonderful time of the year, and THE SIMPSONS flash forward thirty years and find themselves in a tech-savvy, futuristic Springfield. Bart and Lisa have children of their own and decide to spend the holidays as one big family at Homer and Marge's house. Lisa and Bart turn to Homer and Marge for parenting advice and begin to realize that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Blackboard: 'Cafeteria trays are not toboggans'.
Krusty the Clown is stuck in a rut when the television network pulls his show from the air and his talent agency drops him as a client. But when THE SIMPSONS introduce him to seasoned agent Annie, they are surprised to learn that Annie was Krusty's very first agent. Despite their rocky relationship, Annie is convinced to re-sign Krusty and craft his career comeback. But when Krusty's retro comedy show reboot is deemed a critical success, Krusty must decide to stay with his agent or side with the network executives.
Host a tastemaker party at their home to promote Absolut Krusty, Krusty the Clown's own brand of liquor. Mr. Burns takes notice of the party's success and decides to promote Homer to "Account Man" for the Springfield Nuclear Plant. Robert Marlow, a seasoned account veteran, takes Homer under his wing and shows Homer what the high life is like in the corner office. Meanwhile, Lisa introduces Bart to a new literary world which sparks his interest in reading classic novels, and when Homer's long hours at the office become the norm, a family vacation with Marge and the kids help him realize that family always comes before work.
Lisa becomes disheartened when she learns the shocking truth behind the "tween lit" industry and her beloved fantasy novel characters. But Homer decides to cash in on the craze and forms a team to group-write the next "tween lit" hit, with the king of fantasy, Neil Gaiman, lending his expertise to the effort. After catching the eye of a slick industry publisher at the Springfield Book Fair, the team gets an advanced copy of their work and discovers that the corporate lit business is a bigger operation than they imagined.
Marge takes Bart and Lisa on a weekend excursion, but when an unexpected restaurant detour awakens their taste buds, fellow foodies Amuse Bruce and Fois Garth inspire them to start their own food blog, "The Three Mouthketeers." They score an exclusive reservation at Springfield's premiere modern restaurant, but Marge has an unsettling dream during which Anthony Bourdain, Gordon Ramsay, and Mario Batali lead her to reconsider extending the invite to Homer. Later, Marge directs Homer to a different type of cooking lab where he gets into a bind with law enforcement authorities.
BART's science fair project, a mechanical baby seal, outshines Lisa's brainy asteroid model and becomes a popular pet among the retirement home patrons. Meanwhile, Homer gets a new and eager assistant Roz, but when Homer quickly loses his job to her and discovers her evil past, he and Flanders team up to reveal her true dark colors. Blackboard : 'It's November 6th, how come we're not airing a Halloween Show?'.
In the spooky opener of the 22nd annual installment of "Treehouse of Horror," Homer takes a dangerous dive into an isolated canyon on Candy Peak, but when a crashing boulder traps his arm, he channels Aron Ralston to save himself. In "The Diving Bell and Butterball," the first of three hair-raising Halloween tales, a venomous spider bite leaves Homer paralyzed, but when Lisa discovers Homer's ability to communicate through natural gases, he is able to express his love for Marge. The killer spells continue in "Dial D for Diddly," when Ned Flanders, devout preacher by day, transforms into a cold-blooded vigilante by night. In the final terrifying tale, "In the Na'Vi," Bart and Milhouse are assigned on a mission to access a sacred extract on a distant planet. They morph into the land's indigenous one-eyed avatars, but when Bart finds love and an eternal mate abroad, he is caught in planet warfare.
Principal Skinner challenges superintendent Gary Chalmers to take over Bart's education after one of Bart's pranks leads to a school fundraiser debacle. Chalmers takes an unconventional approach to teaching American history which sparks a fascination in President Teddy Roosevelt. Encouraged by Bart's educational renaissance, Chalmers takes Bart and his band of "Rough Riders" on an overnight excursion to Springfield Forest, but after a minor accident, the school administration fires Chalmers for taking the boys on an unauthorized field trip. Determined to get Chalmers' job back, Bart and the boys hold the school hostage until the administration reinstates Chalmers, and they stand up for the teacher who made a meaningful impact. Blackboard "It's not to early to speculate about the 2016 election".
Homer befriends Wayne, a reserved security guard recently hired by the nuclear power plant. Plagued by violent flashbacks from his past as a CIA agent, he must overcome his tortured nightmares to save Homer from a Ukranian terrorist. Meanwhile, Marge fantasizes about being a contestant on "Top Chef" hosted by Tom Colicchio, and the future of Springfield's hottest "it" couple Nedna, Edna Krabappel and Ned Flanders, will be revealed after months of online fan voting and speculation.
Feeling guilty for getting Mrs. Krabappel suspended after one of his school pranks, Bart helps her escape detention, and Ned Flanders winds up saving her life in the process. When Edna and Ned start dating, he is surprised to learn she's been with many of Springfield's men, including Homer and Aerosmith drummer Joey Kramer .
When the Simpsons discover a collection of keys to every door in Springfield, Lisa stumbles upon an eerie hidden classroom beneath Springfield Elementary School. When she shares her discovery with Principal Skinner, the secret room mysteriously disappears and he takes the only key away. A determined Lisa uses her detective skills to lead her back to the room to solve an old school mystery.
After Homer discovers a genius talent for styling hair and opens his own salon, he becomes Springfield's most in-demand hair stylist. But having to listen to women's problems and gossip all day long leads Homer to believe his gift may actually be a curse. Meanwhile, when Milhouse decides to live each day to the fullest, he comes out of his shell and professes his love for Lisa, only to have his heart broken. Milhouse then catches the eye of popular fifth-grader Taffy, causing Lisa to make a bold move. Blackboard: 'I do not deserve a Mothers day gift for being "One Badass Mother".
Fat Tony and Selma, Marge's painfully blunt sister, fall in love and get married after a whirlwind courtship. Marge has her reservations about the couple's marriage after Selma begins to prioritize her looks and ritzy new lifestyle over her family, so Fat Tony invites Homer and Marge to a weekend getaway at the Jersey Shore. Meanwhile, Bart discovers a special talent that allows him to detect the location of truffles by smell, and Lisa jumps at the chance to capitalize on the rare culinary treasures.
The family is greeted by folk singer Ewell Freestone when they visit a peach farm, but when Marge goes overboard with peach-inspired dishes, Lisa and Bart try to get rid of the unwanted fruit. Later, Lisa becomes a magician's apprentice to the legendary Great Raymondo who helps her develop her craft, but a schoolgirl crush clouds her judgment when she is coaxed into revealing the Great Raymondo's most famous magic trick to his phony archnemesis. But when the rival magician's act takes a risky turn, the Great Raymondo has one last trick up his sleeve and stages showdown with Ricky Jay, Penn & Teller and David Copperfield, showing them why he is the master of the craft.
When Homer inadvertently humiliates Bart in front of a stadium crowd, Marge encourages Homer to enroll in a fathering enrichment class taught by therapist Dr. Zander. Shocked to learn that Homer often strangles Bart for mischievous behavior, Dr. Zander conducts a series of treatments with the help of Kareem Abdul-Jabbar to teach Homer what it feels like to be young and small. But when Bart learns that the therapy sessions have transformed Homer into a pushover, he takes advantage of Homer and becomes a school bully. Hoping therapy could also cure Bart of his bullying habits, Marge enlists Dr. Zander's help to patch their relationship. Blackboard: 'I will not ridicule teacher's final four bracket'.
The town is abuzz when Cheech and Chong announce a Springfield stop on their much-anticipated reunion tour. But when Cheech and Chong take the stage in front of their loyal fans, the jokes were just not the same for Chong, so Homer steps in and delivers all the punchlines by heart. Impressed, Cheech invites Homer to go on tour with him as new duo "Cheech and Chunk" while Chong forms a more progressive comedic team, "Teach and Chong," with Principal Skinner. While Homer is on tour, Marge attempts to help the neighborhood cat lady and change her hoarder ways, but turns into a hoarder herself in the process, and Homer realizes that life on the road is not all high times and slapstick humor. Blackboard: 'Daylight Savings is not a failed Bank'.
After a field trip to the desert, Lisa discovers that the desert water mysteriously makes typically combative creatures get along, so she brings some of the water home as a souvenir. When Grampa moves in with the family after getting kicked out of the retirement home, Homer secretly tests the desert water on Grampa, who is instantly cured of his crankiness. A pharmaceutical representative gets word of Homer's discovery and quickly tries to replicate the water into a drug, using Grampa as the primary guinea pig. But when the pills get in the wrong hands and are sold on the black market, unexpected side effects of the new drug take an eye-popping toll on the elderly citizens of Springfield, and the Simpsons learn that their new medical cure comes with major consequences. Blackboard: 'I'm not here on a spitball scholarship'.
Bart's cartoon about an angry dad is turned into "Angry Dad: The Movie" and quickly becomes a critics' favorite. When Russell Brand presents the Golden Globe to Bart's film, Homer usurps the podium and gives his own acceptance speech. The film's winning streak continues with Homer taking credit at each ceremony, so when "Angry Dad" receives an Oscar nomination, Bart keeps it a secret. With the help of DJ Kwanzaa, Homer and Marge arrive at the ceremony just as Halle Berry presents the award. Bart's fellow nominee, Nick Park, helps him realize that creating a film is a team effort, and Bart gives credit where credit is due.
After spending another Valentine's Day alone, Moe attends a seminar led by Dr. Kissingher in the hopes of gaining more confidence with women. Moe takes the doctor's advice and asks Homer to be his wingman, but Moe becomes distraught when women are drawn to Homer as well. Meanwhile, Marge discovers her first gray hairs and surprises both her family and the neighborhood by going completely gray and sporting a brand new mature do, but Bart is not humored when the neighborhood kids tease him about Marge's look. Later, Marge confronts Homer when she learns that he is becoming increasingly popular with the young ladies, but Homer helps Marge realize that he only has eyes for her and proves that love is still in the Springfield air. Blackboard: 'I will not make fun of Cupid's dink'.
Homer becomes obsessed with "Thicker than Waters," a 1980s family sitcom written by David Mamet, and models his parenting skills after the show's sensible father much to the chagrin on Bart, who desperately sets his sights on a brand new dirt bike. But when Homer insists that Bart must earn the dirt bike, Bart takes matters into his own hands and schemes with Russian and Chinese spies to provide top-secret information in exchange for the new bike, which winds up putting Bart in a precarious situation. Later, James Lipton conducts an interview with a television cast on "Inside the Actor's Studio". Blackboard: 'Prince is not the son of Martin Luther King'.
When Smithers offers to help transform Moe's dingy pub into a more refined and trendy lounge, the revamped "Mo's" quickly becomes Springfield's local gay hangout. With Smithers' friends and colleagues infusing new life into "Mo's," business starts to boom, but Moe inadvertently leads his new bar patrons to believe that he, too, is gay. Afraid that telling the truth would hurt his newly flourishing business, Moe's new friends teach him a lesson in acceptance. Meanwhile, Principal Skinner becomes smitten with the new free-spirited music teacher, Ms. Juniper, who inspires the by-the-book principal to take chances. When Skinner finds out that Ms. Juniper's daughter, Melody, has a crush on Bart, he uses Bart to get close to Ms. Juniper.
After the fourth graders and fifth graders engage in a heated dodgeball battle, Bart discovers that one of the fifth graders has the same mysterious scar on his hand. Puzzled by the matching blemishes, Bart tries to understand why and how he got it, leading Marge to explain that seven years ago, she and her girlfriends formed the "The Cool Moms," a tight-knit group of moms who set playdates for their young boys. Inspired to reconnect with the women, Marge's social life soon becomes recharged, but when Bart's playdates stop being fun, he attempts to break up the club, and Marge finally remembers why she left the group in the first place. Blackboard: 'January is not Bart history month'.
Homer spends New Year's Eve in the Springfield Penitentiary after getting caught bribing an official. An FBI investigator offers to reduce his jail time if Homer agrees to go undercover as an informant to investigate Fat Tony. When Homer forges a special bond with Fat Tony and his family, he becomes conflicted between his obligation to the government and his loyalty to his new family. After an unexpected turn of events, Fat Tony's cousin Fit Tony seeks to settle a score with Homer, but winds up teaching him an important lesson. Blackboard: 'Candy Canes are not Elf bones'.
It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas in Springfield, but while Marge gets in the holiday spirit, it's bah humbug for the rest of the family. Disappointed that she is alone spreading the holiday cheer, Marge sends a letter to Martha Clause to help her save the family Christmas. Martha comes to the rescue and transforms the house into the North Pole chalet Marge has always dreamed of, but when the family is noticeably absent from the perfectly trimmed holiday home, she realizes that it's Homer and the kids who make the holidays special. Meanwhile, the Simpsons get ready to sneak away for a tropical holiday vacation in Hawaii, but surprise visitors Mr. Burns and Moe's new friend, Katy Perry delay their getaway. Four special holiday tales will be spun.
When a pigeon flies through the Simpsons' home and suffers a broken wing, Bart makes it his duty to care for the bird - whom he names Ray - and nurse it back to health. When Ray is ready to fly, Homer decides to enter him in a bird race when Danica Patrick appears to him in a dream. Things don't go according to plan, however, when Santa's Little Helper swallows Ray. Worried that Bart needs some help getting over the loss, Marge and Homer take him to a therapy session with Dr. Thurston, who advises that the only cure for Bart's blues is to give away the family dog. But when the Simpsons visit the pup's new home, a shock causes them to rethink their decision. Blackboard: ' "A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving" is as good as "A Charlie Brown Christmas" '.
After learning that he is suffering from multiple illnesses and has only a few weeks to live, Mr. Burns becomes distraught by the town's less-than-sensitive reaction to his announcement. Following an unexpected turn of events, Bart finds Mr. Burns weak and vulnerable in the wilderness and secretly takes him into the Simpsons' home. But when Homer and Marge learn about their new houseguest, they decide it's payback time, and Lisa, determined to stand up for Mr. Burns, learns that old habits die hard.
When the Simpsons visit Marge's childhood home and discover a box of her old belongings, Lisa is surprised to learn that Marge was once a stellar A+ student. After discovering that a distraction caused Marge's grades to slip in high school, Lisa fears that she will end up just like her mom unless she pledges to focus solely on academics. When Lisa learns that prep school Cloisters Academy is accepting new students, Marge puts her feelings aside and makes a secret deal allowing Lisa to attend her dream school. Meanwhile, Bart puts Nelson and his bully ways in place and unintentionally claims the title of School Bully, and Lisa learns a lesson in family and altruism.
Beware of ouija boards, vampires and unexpected guests in the 21st annual installment of the "Treehouse of Horror." In "War and Pieces," the first of three spine-tingling tales, Marge, worried about the effects of excessively violent video games, encourages Bart and Milhouse to give wholesome, classic board games a shot. The best friends discover that board games aren't boring after all when they find themselves playing a real-life game in which they must beat all the challenges before they are allowed to return to home. The supernatural spells continue in "Tweenlight," when Lisa becomes smitten with a mysterious new student, Edmund, who also happens to be a vampire. When a romance blossoms, the young lovers run away to Dracula-la Land, leaving Homer to come to Lisa's rescue. In the final frightening fable, "Master and Cadaver," Homer and Marge set sail on a romantic second honeymoon, but are interrupted when they rescue Roger, a castaway who escaped an attempted poisoning on his ship. Convinced that Roger is sabotaging their getaway and plotting a murder of his own, Homer and Marge take matters into their own hands.
Visit by a Springfield Elementary alum-turned-Ivy-League student pushes Lisa to question her own go-getter attitude and reevaluate the scope of her extracurricular activities. Convinced that there is no such thing as having too many clubs or activities listed on her resume, Lisa jumps at the opportunity to coach Bart's little league team. Despite having little understanding of baseball, Lisa coaches the team to a record winning streak by putting her book smarts in statistics and probability into play. But when Bart questions Lisa's coaching tactics and confronts her for taking the fun out of baseball, Lisa benches him from the championship game. Hoping to lift his spirits, Marge spends the day with Bart at an amusement park where MLB manager and former catcher Mike Scioscia gives Bart sound advice and reminds him of his genuine love of the sport. Meanwhile, with one last chance to win the game, Lisa makes an unexpected call and learns that there is more to sports than winning. Blackboard: 'I must not write all over the walls'.
When Grampa gives each member of the family a portion of his savings, Lisa and Marge spend their money in drastically different ways. Lisa invests in Nelson's brand-new business venture, but soon realizes that her friend's instant success might lure him away from the classroom. Worried that his judgment might be clouded, Lisa introduces Nelson to the well-educated and successful creator of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, only to find out that he too dropped out of school. But when the soaring business suddenly takes a sharp turn, Lisa teaches her friend that education is invaluable.
When Krusty the Clown is announced as the recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize, Homer invites Bart to accompany him on a trip to Oslo for the ceremony. Sensing that Lisa would feel left out, Marge surprises her with a week-long retreat at performing arts camp, where she is greeted by her artsy counselors and fellow musically inclined campers, who inspire her to embrace her creative side. After she returns to Springfield, Lisa becomes restless with her ho-hum suburban lifestyle and sneaks off to Srooklyn in hopes of connecting with her inner hipster, but she soon realizes that the city is not the same as camp . Blackboard 'When I slept in class, it was not to help Leo Dicaprio'.
When Moe discovers a hidden talent for judging contests, he is approached by a television agent to join the AMERICAN IDOL judges' panel. Moe flies to Los Angeles where he tours the Fox lot and receives some sage career advice. Meanwhile, Homer drives Marge crazy when he begins hanging around the house.
Bart becomes convinced that his new neighbor, Walt, is his archenemy, Sideshow Bob, disguised and back for revenge. But when Marge tries to convince Bart otherwise by taking him to visit the state penitentiary, a disturbing truth is revealed.
As Mother's Day approaches, Moe narrates an episode in which he writes a letter to Homer, Apu and Reverend Lovejoy, who are vacationing with their children, and threatens to run away with one of their wives. While the trio tries to determine whose wife Moe is referring to, Homer, Lovejoy and Apu flashback to the intimate moments they initially ignored between Moe and Marge, Manjula and Helen Lovejoy. But when the boys return from their trip, they're in for the surprise of their lives.
Bomb squad mistakenly blows up Homer's unattended gym bag, releasing radiation into the city and authorities react by suspending civil liberties. Wiggum and his men install surveillance cameras around Springfield and round up suspected terrorists, including groundskeeper Willie, but when monitoring the nonstop flow of video imagery proves to be too much, Wiggum enlists concerned citizens to help keep the city safe. Meanwhile, Lisa becomes fed up with being blonde, so she dyes her hair a dark color.
The Simpsons decide to embrace a cheaper, alternate source of energy by erecting a wind turbine in their backyard. But when Homer realizes some of the power is being directed to the local electric company, he decides to remove his home from the grid and becomes completely dependent upon an unreliable source of power. Meanwhile, a storm erupts, trapping a magnificent 150-foot-long blue whale ashore, and Lisa and Homer attempt to help the poor creature. Blackboard: 'Je Ne Suis Pas Francais'. English translation: 'I'm Not French'.
Homer is completing his court-ordered community service when he befriends his supervisor, Chief Wiggum, by offering him one of his sandwiches. Touched by the act of kindness, Wiggum assigns the other convicts unpleasant tasks, but allows Homer to join him at the picnic table. They continue to grow close, but when the Chief gets injured during a botched bank robbery, Homer doesn't come through when Wiggum needs him the most. Meanwhile, Bart becomes addicted to Battle Ball, a Japanese game made up of plastic balls and magnetic cards, and his family and teachers try to help him kick the habit.
When the police are called to diffuse a rowdy crowd at Mr. Burns' estate, one of the officers recognizes priceless stolen paintings on the walls, and the maniacal billionaire is taken downtown for questioning. With Mr. Burns gone, Smithers takes charge of the power plant. But when employees take advantage of his good nature, he exacts revenge by forcing the employees to work night and day. These unfair working conditions prompt Homer and his crew to devise a plan to bust out Mr. Burns. Blackboard 'Hot dogs are not bookmarks'.
When Homer is playing noisily in the yard, it disrupts Flanders' bible-study group. Coaxed by the reverend, a frustrated Flanders takes it upon himself to redeem Homer by inviting the Simpson family on his church retreat to Jerusalem. Unappreciative of the history and culture, Homer would rather hang out at the hotel's breakfast buffet rather than tour the city. But when an eccentric tour guide takes the group to famous monuments, including the Dome of the Rock and the Wailing Wall, Homer finally proves he is not beyond salvation.
Principal Skinner announces that Mrs. Krabappel was called out of town and budget cuts dictate that, until she returns, the school's two fourth grade classes will merge. Bart reluctantly shares a desk with Nikki and develops a flirtatious rapport. Bart talks to Grampa about his new crush, and at Grampa's suggestion, gives Nikki a kiss. But when Nikki starts sending Bart mixed signals, he swears off women forever. Meanwhile, Lisa's classmates ostracize her for being an overachiever, and First Lady Michelle Obama, a self-professed nerd, comes to Lisa's defense.
When Bart fails to turn in his homework, Mrs. Krabappel sends a letter home about Bart's behavior. Despite Bart's best efforts to intercept it, Homer reads the letter, and he and Marge visit Principal Skinner for a parent-teacher conference. Furious, Homer punishes him, but Marge takes a more sympathetic approach. When Bart realizes he can pit Homer and Marge against each other to his benefit, his scheming reaches new heights.
When Miss Hoover asks her students to research their family history, Lisa is horrified to discover that most of her ancestors were bad people - a motley crew of horse thieves and deadbeats. But while rummaging through the attic, Lisa happens upon a diary kept by her ancestor, Eliza Simpson. As Eliza's story unfolds, Lisa learns that her family was part of the Underground Railroad, a group that helped slaves escape to freedom. Eliza recounts liberating a slave named Virgil, but when Lisa presents her findings at school, some of her classmates refute it, leaving Lisa determined to exonerate her family's name.
Homer takes Marge out for a romantic evening of ice skating and hand-holding, but upon entering the rink, they encounter a curling team practicing. Marge and Homer take to the ice and discover their love for the sport, and soon after, join the curling team and compete with them in the Olympic trials. Team Springfield claims the win and moves on to the 2010 Vancouver Games where Bob Costas covers the action. Meanwhile, sleazy vendors introduce Lisa to the world of collecting Olympic pins, and before long, Lisa is hopelessly addicted.
Homer blows off Marge to buy a lottery ticket and winds up winning the million-dollar jackpot. Fearing how Marge will react if she finds out the reason Homer missed their date, Homer keeps his newly inherited fortune a secret and spoils his family with "anonymous" gifts. When Bart finds out, he and Homer spend the money like it's going out of style, including buying front-row to tickets to see Coldplay in concert,.
In the landmark 450th episode of THE SIMPSONS, Krusty is approached by two network executives who want to bring on female co-star Princess Penelope to increase the show's female demographic. The onstage and behind-the-scenes rapport between Krusty and Princess Penelope grows, and before long, Krusty asks for his co-star's hand in marriage. Meanwhile, when Mr. Burns puts a stop to the free donuts at the plant to cut costs, Homer, Lenny and Carl decide to meet with a headhunter who specializes in nuclear workers and opens their eyes to opportunities free of draconian donut-cutting measures.
Grampa is sitting on a bench waiting for his family when a thoughtful-looking man named Marshall Goldman approaches him and asks to hear about his life. Grampa tells Goldman about the time he was on a World War II battleship, which was hit by an enemy torpedo, and Goldman, a human-interest columnist, publishes it in The Springfield Shopper. Later, Grampa meets Mitch Albom and shares another story with Goldman for a follow-up article. Homer becomes jealous of Grampa's newfound fame and seeks a surrogate father. But when Homer discovers a draft of Goldman's third story, he must race to find Grampa before it is published and his life is changed forever.
One snowy day in Springfield, Lisa informs Bart that she and Maggie share a bond that Bart will never understand because he doesn't have a brother, so Bart asks Homer for a baby brother. When Homer denies Bart's request, Bart makes his way to the Springfield Orphanage to find what he thinks he's missing.
After getting lost in a game of hide-and-seek, Lisa wanders into the field and discovers three teenage girls, including Cassandra, who are practicing Wiccans. Though she is skeptical of their spells, the girls assure Lisa that they never hurt anyone and ask her to join their coven. Just before Lisa is inducted into their pact, Chief Wiggum arrives and arrests the three girls for witchcraft and Lisa becomes the star witness in the trial. Meanwhile, Homer starts hanging out with Cleatus and his hillbilly friends when he discovers that they make moonshine.
Fed up with Bart's constant pranks, Principal Skinner tells Bart that there is a former Springfield Elementary student hailed as the best prankster ever - even better than Bart - but he won't divulge the legendary student's name. Bart finally gets Groundskeeper Willie to reveal the prankster's identity: Andy Hamilton. Bart tracks down Andy, who is now 19 years old and hasn't grown out of his pranking days. Bart and Andy become fast friends until Bart gets Andy a job working for the ultimate clown.
In an effort to raise money for charity, Marge and "Philanthro-Chicks" decide to pose for a calendar. At the photo studio, Marge is a bit reluctant to reveal any skin, but the photographer loosens her up with wine and before long, Marge and her pin-up poses are the talk of Springfield. Blackboard: 'I do not have the hots for my mom'.
In the 20th anniversary of THE SIMPSONS annual "Treehouse of Horror" Halloween special, three chilling tales of Halloween horror unwind. First, Lisa becomes livid with Miss Hoover, and in a series of homages to classic Hitchcock sets out for deadly revenge. Next, Krusty's latest fast-food sandwich transforms news anchor Kent Brockman into an enraged zombie and twenty-eight days later, cannibal zombies have overrun Springfield. In the final frightening fable, Homer accidentally falls through a trapdoor in Moe's tavern and impales himself on the pipes of Moe's microbrewery. Moe serves the barflies a glass of delicious beer flavored with Homer's blood and Homer, now half-man, half-brewing apparatus, returns for vengeance.
The men and boys of Springfield become obsessed with Mixed Martial Arts, a violent sport where fighters inflict severe pain on one another. When Marge and her friends stage a protest, the show's promoter embraces the controversy and challenges Marge to a match, promising to shut down the competition if she wins.
When Mrs. Krabappel confiscates student's cell phones, the class, organized by Bart, decides to teach her a lesson by spiking her coffee and watching her make a drunken fool of herself. Principal Skinner fires Mrs. Krabappel and replaces her with a cool new teacher, Zachary Vaughn, who impresses Bart and his friends with a hip attitude and love of texting, blogging and using Twitter and Facebook. Torn by his affection for Mr. Vaughn, yet plagued by guilt, Bart makes his way to Skinner's office to tell him the truth and get Mrs. Krabappel's job back. Blackboard: 'Chalkboarding is not torture'.
Comic Book Guy casts Homer as the lead in "Everyman," a feature film based on a new comic book superhero who possesses the ability to take on the powers of every superhero in every comic he touches. To whip Homer into superhero shape, the movie studio hires celebrity fitness trainer Lyle McCarthy, but Homer has trouble sticking to his new healthy regimen. Blackboard: 'The class hamster isn't just sleeping'.
When nearby Ogdenville's economy crumbles due to tainted barley discovered in Krusty's veggie burgers, the unemployed workers of Ogdenville flock to Springfield. After Mayor Quimby closes Springfield's borders and enlists private citizens to help patrol them, Homer organizes a border patrol group.
Marge and Lisa visit the nail salon where they engage in a spirited debate as to whether a woman can be smart, powerful and beautiful all at the same time. To prove their point, they spin four tales of famous women featuring famous Springfield faces: Selma as Queen Elizabeth I, Lisa as Snow White, Marge as Lady Macbeth and Maggie as the idealistic architect protagonist from Ayn Rand's "The Fountainhead" .
When Marge learns Springfield Elementary is the worst school in the state, she and Homer rent an apartment in the upscale Waverly Hills neighborhood so Bart and Lisa can attend a better school. When Lisa is ostracized by the popular girls at Waverly Hills, Bart uses his newly established bad boy image to impress the other students and increase Lisa's popularity by telling everyone she is best friends with the pop star Alaska Nebraska. However, when Alaska Nebraska comes to town, Lisa is left wishing Bart had never opened his big mouth. Meanwhile, Homer moves into the new Waverly Hills apartment to make it look like someone is living there, and he quickly gets used to the bachelor lifestyle.
When Homer observes Bart and Lisa struggling in certain aspects of their academic and social lives at school, he becomes a proponent of "helicopter parenting," the process of closely monitoring a child and forcing them to succeed. Homer takes hovering to a new level when he chooses a nearly impossible subject for Bart's balsa wood model-building competition and gives Lisa some not-so-friendly advice on how to make friends. Meanwhile, Marge discovers a sauna in the Simpson family's basement that she finds hard to resist. Blackboard: 'I will not put hot sauce in the CPR dummy'.
When Bart and Milhouse pull off a prank at Springfield Elementary, Milhouse takes the fall and gets suspended from school. Homer forces Bart to sign in under Homer's name and visit Grampa at his retirement home, and Bart soon becomes smitten with a delightful 11-year-old volunteer named Jenny. Hoping to impress Jenny, Bart offers to volunteer at the home. But as Bart and Jenny's relationship progresses, Milhouse emerges from his suspension and is less than thrilled about Bart turning his back on him for a girl. Meanwhile, Lisa does a report on what Springfield will look like in 50 years and becomes very depressed at the dreary outlook. A concerned Marge takes Lisa to a psychiatrist who diagnoses Lisa with Environment-Related Despair and puts on her on an antidepressant to cure her eco-blues. Blackboard: 'I will not mock teacher's outdated cell phone'.
In an effort to spend more time with Maggie, Homer takes her to happy hour at Moe's. While at the bar, Moe tells Homer about his new love, Maya, a woman he met on the internet. When Moe finally meets Maya in person, she is just as beautiful as her photos but he can't help but notice one small detail: she is three feet tall. In order to make the relationship work, Moe must learn to love their differences.
When Homer and Marge's marriage turns out to be invalid because Reverend Lovejoy was not licensed at the time, Homer asks Marge to marry him again. But when Homer mysteriously disappears on their wedding day, Bart and Lisa search for answers and are led on a cryptic trail of clues, leading them to Sideshow Bob. Meanwhile, Homer finds himself chained to a pipe in a dark room. When a mysterious voice tells him that the key to unlock his chains is inside a lollipop, he frantically eats it only to discover the lollipop is made of fiery hot sauce and he is tormented as Bart and Lisa race to save him. Blackboard: 'My piggy bank is not entitled to tarp funds'.
The Simpson family travels to Ireland to take Grandpa to have one last beer at his beloved O'Flanagan's Pub in Dunkilderry. However, when they arrive, the little town of Dunkilderry isn't the quaint little Irish village that Grandpa remembers. It has become a gentrified yuppie enclave filled with hipsters on laptops and Bluetooths, surrounded by swanky stores and coffee shops. When they track down O'Flanagan's Pub, the bar is run down and nearly empty. After a few spirits, Homer and Grandpa buy the pub from Tom O'Flanagan, and they are left with trying to bring the bar back to life amidst an ultra-hip, hardworking and sober Irish town. With a little help from Moe, they find the perfect scheme to bring the pub back to life and put "Simpson & Son" on the map.
When Homer leaves Maggie on the doorstep of a convent to keep her safe as he rescues Santa's Little Helper from a sticky situation, the nuns at the convent take Maggie in. Lisa comes up with a plan to infiltrate the convent and rescue Maggie. After deciphering a series of cryptic messages at the convent, Lisa sets off to find Springfield's most coveted jewel and gets a little help from an ancient order of mystery buffs led by Comic Book Guy and Principal Skinner. But when Springfield's Freemasons, led by Mr. Burns, get wind of Lisa's quest, she must race to solve the mystery and find Maggie.
After too many years of financing Homer's annual Mardi Gras party on home equity loans, Homer and Marge's adjustable-rate mortgage skyrockets and they are forced to put their house up for sale. Flanders does a good deed by outbidding Mr. Burns and purchasing the property, thus becoming Homer and Marge's new landlord. But when Homer publicly accuses Flanders of neglecting the Simpsons' unsafe living conditions, Flanders threatens to throw the family out on the streets. Blackboard: 'I will not have fun with educational toys'.
Bart is informed that he and a select group of students have received perfect scores on a practice test for the upcoming Vice President's Assessment Test. As a result, he will be exempt from taking the real exam and will be transported by helicopter to a pizza party. Shocked at how Bart could have performed better than she did, Lisa freezes up when it comes time for her to take the exam. However, Bart and the others soon realize their trip is not what it seems, and their day turns into an adventure all its own. Meanwhile, when Homer is late on making an insurance payment, he must avoid bodily accidents at all costs until his insurance check is cashed, making for one very tense afternoon. Blackboard: '"march madness" is not an excuse for missing school'.
When Mayor Quimby inducts Vance Connor into the Springfield Walk of Fame, Homer recounts how he ran against Vance for class president in high school and lost. After a little digging, Homer learns that the election had been rigged, and he wonders what course his life would have taken if only fate had smiled on him. Homer soon meets an old Italian cook at Luigi's Italian Restaurant whose magical tomato sauce, when stirred in just the right way, reveals what Homer's life would have been like had he won the election. However, when Homer gets a chance to see what his life could have been, he wonders if fate was actually been on his side all along.
Lisa meets an equally academic and creative new friend named Juliet (guest voice Emily Blunt), and together they construct a fantasy world that takes them both a little too far from reality.
During the annual billionaires' retreat, Mr. Burns wins the Boston Celtics in a casual game of poker. While hosting the season opener in Springfield, Mr. Burns witnesses the antics of Dallas Mavericks' owner Mark Cuban (guest voice as himself). Fascinated with his behavior, Mr. Burns decides to emulate Cuban's over-the-top crowd pleasing stunts in order to win over the hearts of Springfield's basketball fans. In the midst of his failing endeavor, Mr. Burns decides that the best way to win over the fans is to build a brand new, state-of-the-art sports arena. Unfortunately, the last remaining bee colony in Springfield is located on the proposed stadium site, and Lisa is single-handedly spearheading a movement to protect them. As Lisa fights for a safe haven for the bees, Homer attempts to help the quickly diminishing bee population by mating the Springfield bees with Africanized bees, creating a buzzworthy fiasco.
The Simpson family takes a trip to the Mapple Store at the Springfield Mall where Lisa get her very own Mypod, and Bart interrupts an announcement from Steve Mobbs with his own voiceover, causing pandemonium to break loose in the store. On his way home from the mall, Bart narrowly escapes punishment and befriends a Muslim boy named Bashir. Homer becomes suspicious of Bart's new friend and invites Bashir, his mother (guest voice Shohreh Aghdashloo) and his father over for dinner so he can investigate their supposed anti-American sentiments. Having already offended Bashir and his family at dinner, Homer goes to their home to apologize, but he instead snoops around their house, a la Jack Bauer, and uncovers what he believes to be a terrorist plot to blow up the Springfield Mall. The race is on as Homer tries to warn the residents of Springfield about the impending disaster. Blackboard 'Prosperity is just around the corner'.
Lisa discovers her amazing talent for doing crossword puzzles and becomes an expert cruciverbalist, and she soon enters a citywide crossword puzzle tournament. Homer, short on cash after abandoning his "Sweet Conclusions" professional break-up artist business, goes to cheer Lisa on at her tournament and discovers an underground crossword puzzle betting ring. In the ultimate betrayal, Homer profits from betting against Lisa in the championship match. When the heartbroken Lisa finds out, Homer must spell out his love for her with a little help from New York Times crossword puzzle editor Will Shortz (guest voice as himself) and master crossword constructor Merl Reagle (guest voice as himself).
When the Simpson family takes a road trip to a cabin in the woods, a series of flashbacks depict Homer and Marge's blissful courtship and their early married years. They recall their first encounter with Flanders and Maude twenty years prior at the very same cabins, where Flanders insisted the unmarried Homer and Marge stay in separates rooms. Later, they recall when they each met distracting members of the opposite sex who nearly wooed Homer and Marge away from each other. Bart and Lisa also reflect on happier times from their early childhood. Despite the obstacles and the passing of time, Homer and Marge attempt to see the forest for the trees.
Three chilling tales of Halloween horror unwind in THE SIMPSONS annual "Treehouse of Horror" Halloween special. First, Homer kills off celebrities so their likenesses can be exploited free-of-charge in "How to Get Ahead in Dead-Vertising." Next, Transformer-like robots duke it out in Springfield in "Untitled Robot Parody." And in "It's the Grand Pumpkin, Milhouse," Lisa accompanies Milhouse to a pumpkin patch to await the appearance of the Grand Pumpkin, but when he finally appears, the Grand Pumpkin goes on a rampage to avenge all the pumpkins carved and tortured in the name of Halloween. Also, the highly-anticipated episode opener features Homer Simpson as he attempts to cast his ballot for the 2008 Presidential election with a deadly twist.
When Lenny wins the lottery and invites the Simpson family to a celebratory party at a posh hotel, Bart meets his doppelganger, Simon Woosterfield, who happens to be a member of the richest family in Springfield. Simon and Bart decide to switch places, and Bart arrives at the lavish Woosterfield mansion only to find football great Joe Montana (guest-voicing as himself) hanging around the estate. As Simon adjusts to the simple life over at the Simpson household, Bart begins to notice his wealthy new siblings acting strangely toward him. With some frightening words of wisdom from Mr. Burns, Bart realizes his new siblings are plotting his demise so they can inherit the Woosterfield family fortune all for themselves. Lisa and Simon must reach Bart before he goes from riches to ditches. Blackboard: 'There's no such month as Rocktober'.
In order to save up money to buy a cell phone, Bart takes a job at a country club retrieving golf balls. While at the course, Bart watches celebrities, including Leary (guest-starring as himself) playing a round. When Leary's cell phone rings just as he is about to take a swing, he furiously throws the phone in the air and it lands right next to Bart. Bart decides to keep the cell and makes prank calls to all over the world pretending to be Leary. He even accepts a job offer from famed producer Grazer (guest-starring as himself) to star in the film version of "Everyone Poops." When Marge discovers what Bart has been up to, she confiscates the device and calls Leary to return the phone. But Leary has a better idea, and instructs Marge to activate the GPS system on the phone so she can track Bart's every move. Bart quickly catches on and devises a plan that sends the family on a wild goose chase all the way to Machu Picchu. Blackboard: 'teacher's diet is working'.
Homer is sent to jail after a haphazard, booze-free brawl at the Springfield St. Patrick's Day parade. When he goes to get his bail bond, Homer meets Lucky Jim (guest voice Forster) and Wolf the Bounty Hunter and decides to try his own hand at the lucrative profession. The new-and-improved Homer the Bounty Hunter soon teams up with Ned Flanders to create quite the unlikely bounty-hunting duo, but when Homer's new no-mercy attitude gets the best of him, Flanders is less than impressed. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to her, Marge begins working at an erotic bakery.
As Krusty's new assistant, Lisa steals the spotlight and gets her own television show, leaving Krusty behind. But when she's honored as Entertainer of the Year at the Springfield Media Awards, she realizes that the she may not be cut out for showbiz after all. Meanwhile, Bart and Homer spend some time bonding through their newfound love of coin-collecting.
When Homer's mother Mona (guest voice Glenn Close) unexpectedly passes away, Homer is filled with guilt for not telling her how much he loved her before she died. To make it up to her, Homer decides to fulfill her final wishes by throwing her ashes over Lake Wastershare at Springfield Monument Park. Blackboard: 'This punishment is not medieval.'.
Lisa makes a documentary about her family for a school project. After the success of her project, Principal Skinner and Superintendent Chalmers encourage her to enter the film into the Sundance Film Festival. But when Lisa's film premieres at Sundance, Homer, Marge and Bart are embarrassed by the candid behind-the-scenes look at their lives.
When Bart joins the 4-H Club, he unexpectedly falls in love with a cow named Lou. But when Bart finds out that Lou has been sold to a slaughterhouse, he becomes determined to save him. Bart and Lisa free Lou from the slaughterhouse, and Bart gives the cow to Mary, a fellow 4-H Club member. However, Mary's father mistakenly believes Bart is giving them the cow as a dowry for Mary's hand in marriage. When Homer and Marge hear of Bart's engagement, they devise a plan to save Lou and free Bart from his marriage.
When Mayor Quimby realizes the city of Springfield has gone broke, Homer suggests they feign a natural disaster in order to obtain relief funds from the federal government. When the plan goes awry, Lisa goes through the town's financial records only to discover millions in uncollected city taxes. Springfield hits up its most notorious tax evaders, and Lurleen Lumpkin, a country music star Homer once managed, remains the last outstanding debtor. As Springfieldians scour the city to find her, Marge reluctantly permits the fugitive to stay with the family, creating a very interesting dynamic in the Simpson household.
When Lisa convinces Marge to pursue her childhood dream of becoming a ballerina by auditioning for the Chazz Busby Ballet Academy, Chazz discovers Lisa's natural talent and enrolls her in the academy instead. During a break from practice, Lisa inhales her fellow ballerinas' cigarette smoke and attributes her improvement in ballet to smoking. Lisa soon becomes addicted to secondhand smoke, with no chance of quitting in sight. Meanwhile, Homer shows Bart his secret room where he manufactures beef jerky. When Homer realizes that a family of raccoons have made off with his beef, he decides to confront the animals.
Marge hires a nutritionist who puts Homer on a strict diet, but Homer decides to sneak in snacks and meals on the side. Marge becomes suspicious of Homer's weight gain and calls the producers of "The Sneakers," a take-off on "Cheaters." Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa go bike-riding in Springfield National Park, where they run into Martin Prince and play a prank on him. Bart and Lisa are wracked with guilt when their prank goes terribly wrong they think they're responsible for the accidental death of Martin Prince.
When a new, tough-looking kid at school named Donny teams up with Bart to help him carry out his pranks, Bart thinks he has found his ultimate partner in crime. However, when Bart's seemingly foolproof pranks begin to backfire, Groundskeeper Willie warns Bart that he smells a rat in Bart's group of friends. With Principal Skinner on his case and the possibility of expulsion on the horizon, Bart must figure out who he can trust and who he must get rid of before it is too late. Meanwhile, Homer receives a fancy loaner car after Marge damages their old car in an accident, and he grows extremely attached to his new set of luxury wheels.
To celebrate Valentine's Day, Homer takes Marge to the Tunnel of Love at a carnival. But when Bart pulls a prank involving some Jell-O, they become hopelessly stranded. Homer tries to cheer Marge up by recounting some of the greatest love stories of all time, beginning with Bonnie and Clyde (as Marge and Homer) who steal each others' hearts as they rob their town dry. Next, Marge tells the story of two dogs, Sadie (Marge) and Scamp (Homer), in her take on "Lady and the Tramp." Lastly, Bart spins the final romantic tale in his recounting of the rock-and-roll romance of the The Sex Pistols when Nancy Spungeon (Lisa) falls for the rebellious Sid Vicious (Nelson).
When Bart and Lisa discover Marge's diploma from Springfield University, Marge reveals that she had attended the university back when she and Homer had first started dating. In a flash back, Homer gives up his dreams of becoming a musician and takes a job at his father's laser tag warehouse to support Marge attending Springfield University. However, when Marge finds herself attracted to an offbeat professor named Professor August, Homer decides he has had enough of Marge's wandering eye. Homer instead focuses his emotions on his music, inventing a new sound called "grunge." As Marge continues to date the pretentious professor, Homer becomes the hottest grunge artist around, as evidenced by Weird Al's parody of his music. But when Marge sees a special news report on MTV with Kurt Loder announcing that Homer's band, Sadgasm, has broken up and that Homer is holed-up in a mansion hopelessly addicted to drugs, Marge must choose between her new life and her old love.
When Homer disposes of a leaky battery along with his fast food containers, he causes an explosion that destroys Springfield's fast-food district. Mayor Quimby proposes to rebuild the district during the next election. The next election, however, isn't until June, so Quimby decides to move it to the upcoming Saturday. This change makes Springfield the first city in the nation to hold a presidential primary. Excitement builds as reporters from around the country descend upon Springfield to cover the debate. The news is dismal though as the candidates turn out to be less than compelling. On the night of the primary, Kent Brockman announces an unexpected turn of events: Springfield voters rejected all the leading candidates and embraced a write-in: Ralph Wiggum. Much to Lisa's chagrin, the leaders of both parties realize that embracing Ralph as a candidate means certain victory come November. Although no one knows for sure which political party Ralph is representing, he insists that everyone is invited to his party. Blackboard: 'Teacher did not pay too much for her condo'.
Homer wakes up one morning only to find himself outdoors and covered with snow. With no recollection of what happened the night before, aside from a lingering hangover, Homer makes his way home only to find his entire family missing. Hopelessly confused, Homer makes his way to Moe's bar, where Moe reveals that Homer drank a "Forget-Me-Shot" the night before - a drink is so potent, it wipes out a the last 24 hours of one's memory. When Wiggum informs Homer of a domestic disturbance at his house the night before, Homer begins to worry that he may have done something awful. As he probes his cloudy memory to unravel the mystery, Homer turns to Professor Frink, who hooks him up to a device that allows him to explore his memories, and he interacts with his Memory Family to piece together the night's events.
Kelsey Grammer returns to guest-voice as the infamous Sideshow Bob, David Hyde Pierce as Sideshow Bob's dubious brother Cecil Terwilliger, and John Mahoney as their father, Mr. Terwilliger. Marge dreams that Keith Olbermann (guest-voicing as himself) chides her for fast-forwarding through television commercials. Marge tries her to make restitution by watching hours of advertisements, and she and the Simpson family take particular interest in an ad for Wes Doobner's World-Famous Family-Style Rib Huts. They drive to the restaurant, only to find Sideshow Bob waiting for them, triumphant in his elaborate hoax to lure them to their doom. When Sideshow Bob's attempt to terminate the family is foiled, he is put on trial, where his father blames Sideshow Bob's psychosis on Bart. During the proceedings, Bart accidentally kills his old nemesis, and Bob's brother Cecil invites Bart to attend the memorial service for Sideshow Bob to bury the hatchet for good.
Much to the Comic Book Guy's chagrin, Bart, Lisa and Milhouse check out a new comic book store called Coolsville, where they are treated like royalty by a friendly comic book buff named Milo (guest voice Jack Black). Coolsville attracts some real-life comic book creators, such as Alan Moore, Art Spiegelman and Dan Clowes (guest-voicing as themselves), and the Comic Book Guy wages war on Coolsville in an attempt to win back his customers. Meanwhile, Marge decides her middle-aged physique could use some help, and she launches a gym for "regular women." Marge's gym becomes wildly successful and as her fame grows, Homer fears she will dump him for a younger, more fit guy. Homer decides to take matters into his own hands to get into shape.
When Milhouse's parents are lost at sea and presumed dead, Milhouse decides it's time to begin acting like a real man, and his new attitude makes him more attractive and popular than ever. Bart can't stand that Milhouse has become cooler than him, and he devises a plan to win back his cooler-than-Milhouse status. Meanwhile, Homer finds himself in hot water when he can't remember the color of Marge's eyes, and Marge vows not to let Homer see her eyes again until he remembers their color.
The frightfest begins in "Mr. and Mrs. Simpson" as Homer and Marge leave for what appears to be an ordinary day. But Homer is living a double life as a secret agent, and he is assigned to eliminate Kent Brockman. When a mysterious woman blocks Homer's shot and tries to kill Brockman herself, Homer finds that his competition "hits" a little too close to home. In "E.T. Go Home," Bart and Lisa come to the aid of Kodo the space alien, who's hiding from the government. Kodo asks them to help him obtain a long list of devices so he can reconnect with his home planet, but his intentions prove to be anything but friendly. In the final Halloween scare, "Heck House," Bart, Lisa and their friends spend Halloween night pulling pranks on unsuspecting people in Springfield. But when they go too far, Flanders decides he's going to spook them straight. Transforming the church into the "Heck House," Flanders is filled with supernatural power and subjects the children to his wrath of seven deadly sins.
While waiting in line at the bank, Marge strikes up a conversation with a strange man named Dwight (Steve Buscemi) who later attempts to rob the bank. When the police show up, Marge convinces a cornered Dwight to turn himself in by promising to visit him in prison. As Dwight eagerly awaits Marge's visit, Homer assures her that Dwight will not expect her to actually visit. But when Dwight receives a phone call and the caller (Ted Nugent) isn't Marge, he escapes to find her. Watching the news report about Dwight's jail break, she wishes she had kept her promise.
Feeling that Maggie is getting too clingy, Marge hires a counselor to teach her the "C.R.I.E. Method," a counseling program that helps parents raise their children to be very independent at an early age. But the method works a little too well, leaving Maggie with no need for Marge at all. Meanwhile, Homer goes in search of milk for Maggie in Mookington and ends up having his car towed by a tow truck driver named Louie (Matt Dillon) who introduces Homer to the joy of towing cars for a living. Louie invites Homer to be the tow truck driver for Springfield on one condition: that Homer stay off of Louie's turf in Mookington. When Homer gets a little too "tow happy," the residents of Springfield set Homer up to look like he's towing in Louie's territory, and Homer must suffer the wrath. With Homer missing, the newly independent Maggie is spurred to action.
Homer injures himself in a fall, and while in the hospital he develops the ability to sing in a beautiful, operatic voice whenever he is lying on his back. Mr. Burns overhears Homer during one of his singing sessions at the hospital and immediately hires him to sing the lead in his production of "La Bohème." Although Homer has to lie down during the performance, he wows the crowd at the Springfield Opera House. Homer becomes an enormous celebrity, especially with the ladies - much to Marge's chagrin. While running from a mob of crazed fans, Homer is saved by a mysterious woman named Julia (Maya Rudolph), who turns out to be a little too concerned for Homer's well being. Blackboard 'The Wall Street Journal is better than ever.'.
After Homer saves Mr. Burns from drowning in a mall fountain, Burns thanks him by taking him on a whirlwind trip to Chicago on his private plane. Homer is smitten with the luxury jet and all the perks that come with it, including flying with song legend Lionel Richie, who serenades him with a customized version of "Say You, Say Me." After returning home, Homer makes it his mission to find a job that offers him the chance to fly on a corporate jet and enlists a life coach, guest star Stephen Colbert, to help fulfill this dream.
At the Simpsons' annual dental check-up, Lisa gets an education in dental hygiene from a video starring Ludacris (guest voice Chris "Ludacris" Bridges) as Luda-Crest, a tube of toothpaste with a talent for rapping. The Simpsons stop for ice cream on the way home from the dentist, and when Homer purchases the 1-millionth ice cream cone, he is featured on Kent Brockman's nightly news program. However, the innocent interview turns into trouble when Brockman uses a shocking expletive and Ned Flanders wages an anti-indecency campaign. The Simpsons take in the dejected Brockman, and he and Lisa begin to devise a scheme for the anchor to make his comeback. Meanwhile, Principal Skinner ushers the students of Springfield Elementary into a new era of sneaking, snooping and snitching with the opening of the school's CTU Counter Truancy Unit with Lisa heading up the operation. Homer is sent on a mission to dispose of a container of yogurt so far past its freshness date that it could be toxic, but the reeking yogurt falls into the wrong hands. With the help of Jack Bauer (guest voice Kiefer Sutherland) and Chloe O'Brian (guest voice Mary Lynn Rajskub), Bart and Lisa must stop bullies Dolph, Kearney and Jimbo from releasing the ultimate stink bomb at the school's annual bake sale.
In a parody of "24," the school's Counter Truancy Unit tries to stop three sixth-graders planning to disrupt the school bake sale with a stink bomb.
Homer is upset when he realizes that Marge brought him and the family to a boring Harvest Fest instead of his much-anticipated day of debauchery at October Fest. Attempting to leave, Homer accidentally drags the family into a puzzling cornfield maze. When the whole family manages to escape except for Homer, they send out Santa's Little Helper, who sniffs out Homer and rescues him. Santa's Little Helper becomes a local hero and the Simpsons decide to enroll him in Police Dog Academy, where he's teamed with a grizzled veteran cop named Lou and they become a crime-busting duo. Bart's excitement quickly dissipates when a jaded Santa's Little Helper bites him, and the Simpsons send the dog away to live with Chief Wiggum. To appease Bart's depression after the loss of his dog, Marge agrees to buy him a huge pet snake. But when the snake causes a life-threatening situation at Bart and Lisa's school, Santa's Little Helper gets a chance to redeem himself.
Maggie goes on a path of destruction in the Simpsons' home after Marge follows advice in a parenting magazine and throws away her pacifier. Marge finally gives in and sends Homer to get Maggie a new pacifier, but when he can't find the right brand, Maggie comes up with her own substitute - an especially squeaky dog toy. Homer can't sleep through the toy's incessant squeaking and is driven to take sleeping pills, which turn him into a sleepwalker with a penchant for mischief. When one of Homer's sleepwalking schemes leaves the entire Springfield Fire Department debilitated in the hospital, Homer and some of his fellow Springfieldians become volunteer firefighters. They extinguish several fires and are rewarded with gifts, but when the gifts stop coming, they seek other forms of compensation for their heroic acts.
Bart becomes a hometown hero when he makes the game-winning catch at his Little League game, sending the Springfield Isotots to the Little League championship for the first time ever. However, Springfield turns on him when he drops an easy pop fly in the bottom of the ninth, losing the game for his team. As the citizens of Springfield continue to mock and terrorize Bart, his guilt and shame threaten to send him over the edge. In an effort to cheer him up, Lisa introduces Bart to Bill Buckner. Meanwhile, after falling asleep in a department store display bed, Homer is saved from disaster when a customer mistakes Homer's crafty excuses for a sales pitch, leading the store owner to hire Homer as a salesperson. When the Lovejoys return a mattress they had purchased in hopes of spicing up their sex life, they find success on Homer's personal mattress and convince him to trade, a transaction Homer and Marge immediately regret and seek to remedy.
Marge becomes a spectacle during a PTA meeting for not having an e-mail address, and she decides to take a chance on using the Internet. Amazed and delighted by all the Internet has to offer, Marge joins a popular role-playing fantasy game called 'Earthland Realms' To Marge's dismay, the game has her interacting with practically the whole town of Springfield including Bart, who happens to be the game's most feared and destructive player. Meanwhile, Homer saves Lisa's soccer game from cancellation after he volunteers to take the place of a referee who recently quit. However, Homer's refereeing skills only exasperate Lisa, and her competitive streak gets the best of her.
When a candle on Homer's birthday cake sets fire to his party hat, the Springfield fire department must save the Simpson home from peril for the sixth time that month. Marge is inspired to purchase a fireproof safe to protect the family's most precious valuables, but a freak accident causes the safe itself to explode and destroy its contents, including Marge's family photo album. Refusing to accept the tragedy, Marge decides to restage all of the family's photographs, and when a celebrity dating scandal is captured in the background of one of their photos, the Simpsons strike tabloid gold. Tasting success and seeing money to be made, Homer takes to the streets as one of the paparazzi. Overnight, Homer becomes Springfield's most valued photographer, and he appears unstoppable. However, when he crashes a celebrity wedding, the subjects who've been humiliated in his photos band together to seek revenge against Homer.
The court appoints an accountant for Homer when he incorrectly files for bankruptcy, which results in his cutting back on all of his expenses, including Grampa's nursing home. In an unexpected turn of events, Grampa and Selma fall in love and move in together, and Homer and Patty plot to break up their love connection. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa con a delivery man into giving them the most sought-after commodity in the neighborhood - cardboard boxes. Their alliance is put to the test when the delivery man realizes he was duped. Blackboard: 'We are not all naked under out clothes'.
When the ever-righteous Lisa protests denying education to Cletus' 'hillbilly' kids, Principal Skinner offers her a chance to tutor the kids herself. However, Lisa's plans to help are diverted when Krusty spots the kids during their field trip and decides to use them as a musical act for his show. Meanwhile, in a scheme to steal his lunch for the day, Bart tries to scare his peers out of the cafeteria by claiming it's haunted by the ghost of an old school chef who uses students as ingredients in his recipes. When the school erupts with fear and chaos, Bart is punished and sent to receive psychiatric treatment, and he develops a unique relationship with his therapist.
An eccentric documentary filmmaker Declan Desmond offers an inside look at his work chronicling the growth and development of some of Springfield's 'finest' for his documentary, 'Growing up Springfield.' We see Marge put her photojournalism dreams on hold in order to support Homer as he tries out odd jobs in search of success that continually evades him until a strange invention turns it all around for the couple. However, a suspicious Desmond challenges the Simpsons, who have a lot of questions to answer about their overnight success.
When Lisa struggles to find excitement and intrigue in her family heritage for a school presentation, she decides to take creative license in crafting her heritage as a Native American, since it's only for a school project. What begins as an innocent embellishment quickly turns into a web of lies when Lisa is chosen to represent the school, and 'her people,' at City Hall, and then as a keynote speaker for the National Native American Tribal Council. As a reward for his heroic act, Bart is granted a driver's license, and in an attempt to escape endless family errands and chauffeuring he flees to a faraway town where he is romanced by an older teenage girl whose expectations may prove to be too much for Bart.
After the Simpsons' car breaks down, the family tells each other tales of revenge gone wrong. Marge offers a cautionary tale of revenge from 19th-century France, where Homer is charged with treason; Lisa tells of a nerd revenge at Springfield Elementary involving Milhouse leading the nerds to overthrow the bullies; and Bart's story follows the great crime-fighter.
While watching a home movie, Marge becomes depressed as she is reminded of memorable childhood vacations spent at Barnacle Bay. Hating to see Marge sad, Homer and the kids take her on a surprise trip to the bay, only to discover that it has turned into a rundown mess due to the absence of fish. Homer and the kids lovingly give the boardwalk a whole new makeover for Marge. But when Homer accidentally lights the renovated carousal on fire, stirring up an angry mob of townspeople, more than just waves come crashing down.
During a holiday ice skating show starring guest voice Elvis Stojko, Homer jumps into a chaotic brawl involving the other ice skaters. In order to escape the chaos, Marge decides to take the family holiday shopping. Gil, dressed as Santa Claus, unknowingly gives Lisa a sold-out Malibu Stacy doll that belongs to his boss' daughter. When Gil loses his job, the Simpsons invite him over for Christmas dinner, which becomes a huge mistake as Gil moves in uninvited and mooches off the Simpsons. Out of guilt, Marge continually allows Gil to prolong his stay, but when her patience wears thin, she's forced to overcome her fear and finally say 'no'. Blackboard: 'Frankincense is not a monster'.
After Bart convinces all his friends not to go to Nelson's birthday party, Marge forces him to attend. After the party, Bart becomes Nelson's new best friend and under Nelson's protection no one dares to mess with Bart. There's only drawback to his newfound friend/bodyguard ; he can no longer pal around with Milhouse.
After Homer gets fired at the nuclear power plant, he takes over the ice cream truck business, while a depressed Marge creates popsicle stick sculptures to keep busy. The sculptures quickly become popular and Marge is excited to have a purpose in life, until a turn of events divides the Simpsons household.
When Homer forgets Moe's birthday, Moe's anger inspires Lisa to write about him for her school report. She finds a poetic side to Moe and helps him get published in "American Poetry Perspectives." However, when Moe is featured at a literary conference, where he encounters Gore Vidal, Michael Chabon, Tom Wolfe and Jonathan Franzen, he takes all the credit despite Lisa's feelings.
After Bart gets out of a commitment to join the Army at 18, Homer falls prey to a couple of Army recruiters and lands himself in basic training. Homer, of course, treats it like summer camp and infuriates his hard-nosed colonel when he is unfazed by the constant hazing and humiliation. Homer is assigned as the enemy of the Army's war games, but when the war games get out of hand and Springfield becomes the battlefield, Homer and the Springfield community must join forces before the city goes up in smoke.
Hand out screams and scare up laughs in their annual, bone-chilling Halloween special. The horror starts in 'Married To The Blob,' when a meteor falls to Earth and reveals a green goo that Homer mistakes for a marshmallow. After Homer eats the goo, he turns into a rampaging blob with a never-ending appetite that even guest voice Dr. Phil McGraw can't stop. In 'You Gotta Know When To Golem,' the fright-fest continues when Bart brings Golem, guest voice Richard Lewis as a legendary monster from Jewish folklore, to life and forces him to carry out his ghastly bidding. But when the creature is finally freed of his evil-doing, Marge, Bart and Lisa create a female monster that captures Golem's heart. In the final scare, 'The Day the Earth Looked Stupid,' a fake radio broadcast convinces the residents of Springfield that they're in the midst of an alien invasion, throwing the town into a state of pandemonium ; which only worsens when the invasion stops being a hoax and becomes reality.
Hoping to see a new side to Homer, Marge convinces him to buy a refined collection of carpentry books. To Marge's dismay, the books only gather dust until she accidentally breaks a nightstand - and uses the books to fix it herself. Soon Marge is hammering together everything from birdfeeders to doghouses and it isn't long before she decides to transform her new skills into a full-fledged business. Unfortunately, the residents of Springfield don't trust a handywoman to make repairs, so Marge hires Homer to pose as a "front" while she handles the real work. Meanwhile, Bart finds out that peanuts are no longer allowed at Springfield Elementary because someone suffers from an allergy. But this loss becomes his treasure when he finds out that the allergy belongs to his nemesis, the one and only Principal Skinner. Before long, both Bart and Homer are in over their heads and it's up to Marge to nail things back together.
When Bart turns a quiet funeral into a chaotic mess, his parents are faced with a mob of angry Springfieldians who have had enough. Homer and Marge desperately look to a child psychiatrist for help, who suggests that Bart take up drumming to channel his energy. Before long, Bart is laying down fills like a pro, getting into drum-offs with The White Stripes, and jamming in a band with Lisa's favorite jazz musicians. It doesn't take long before Lisa's encouragement turns to deep-seated jealousy, forcing the Simpson siblings to learn how to march to the beat of the same drum.
After Lisa befriends Fat Tony's son Michael, Fat Tony invites the Simpsons over for dinner as a sign of gratitude. Shockingly, Fat Tony is shot by a rival family moments after Michael admits he would rather be a chef than take over the family business. Fat Tony's main thugs, Dante and Dante Jr., want Michael to be the new kingpin, but when he declines, Homer steps up and leads the family on a major mob spree in "The Mook, The Chef, The Wife and Her Homer".
After a passionate kiss between Marge and Homer airs on the Isotope Jumbotron, struggling second baseman Buck Mitchell turns to the couple for marital advice. The Simpsons are able to get Buck and his sexy singing wife, Fiona, on track, and the Isotopes' season turns for the better. Things seem to be coming up aces for the Simpsons until Buck catches Homer giving Fiona a post-show neck massage, which results in both couples separating. Blackboard 'Have a great summer everyone'.
After visiting an evolution exhibit narrated by guest star Griffith, Flanders pushes Mayor Quimby to appoint Reverend Lovejoy as a "Mortality Czar" in charge of spreading the theory of creationism. Darwin's theories are quickly outlawed and Lisa finds herself as the only supporter of the scientific theory. After holding secret evolution classes, Lisa is arrested and retains Southern lawyer Wallace Brady to help defend her beliefs in front of a judge. While Flanders is on the stand in court, Homer's antics cause him to crack under pressure and he calls Homer an ape, which leads the judge to believe Homer resembles the missing link - putting a monkey wrench in the prosecutors' case. Blackboard: 'Je ne parle pas Francais'.
After a spring-cleaning frenzy and inhaling too many fumes, Marge suffers from retrograde amnesia. In an effort to bring back her memory, Homer takes her around town to re-familiarize her with her surroundings. Marge still has no recollection of who Homer is and puts herself back on the singles market. Not until she realizes that Homer is truly genuine at heart will she remember who he is and why she loves him. Blackboard ' I will not leak the plot of the movie'.
Springfield is in an uproar after Principal Skinner makes a sexist comment at the end of an Itchy and Scratchy musical. Principal Skinner is replaced by Melanie Upfoot, a women's educational expert, who decides to divide the school into two different schools: one for boys, and one for girls. Studious Lisa soon becomes frustrated when she isn't learning anything from "girls' school." When the Principal refuses to allow her to take math at the boys' school, Lisa decides to dress up as a boy. While Bart teaches her the ropes of boyhood, Lisa wins the math award at the Student Achievement Awards and learns what it's really like to be a part of the "boys' club" .
When the Simpsons' plans for a nice family outing at the Frying Dutchman turn into a dining disaster, the family tries to salvage the night by telling different stories of disasters at sea. Lisa recounts the Mayflower voyage, Bart tells tales of Tahitian mutiny and Homer puts his own spin on the capsizing cruise ships.
Homer learns that the nuclear power plant is being shut down and outsourced to India. After Homer is sent to train the new employees, he becomes power hungry in his new position of authority. Meanwhile, Selma and Patty meet their Hollywood heartthrob, MacGyver, and kidnap him for their own obsessive worship. When Anderson discovers how exciting real-life drama can be, he refuses to leave until Selma and Patty devise their own plan.
Grampa ruins Homer's plans to make Springfield the new home of a pro football franchise when he mistakes the Commissioner of Football for a burglar and the football stadium is transformed into a bull fighting arena. Tortured by threatening calls from his family and friends, Grampa seeks Manfred Manslaughter's help in committing suicide. When his plan fails at the last minute, Grampa gets a new outlook on life and decides to become Springfield's very own matador. Blackboard: 'I will not flip the classroom upside down'.
Homer's obsession with Lenny's new plasma TV prompts Marge to enter the family in a sweepstakes, and they win a trip to the Fox Studio Lot. Against Marge's wishes, Homer signs them up for a "Trading Spouses"-type show and is forced to take in a controlling wife, while Marge moves in with a beaten-down husband, Charlie, and his perfect son. Charlie quickly develops a crush on Marge, while she tries to give him the strength to stand up to his own wife. Blackboard 'I will not laminate dog doo'.
Ned Flanders wins a new computer that features guest star Sarandon as the "You've Got Mail" voice and he offers it to Marge, as he has no use for it. In return, Marge babysits the Flanders children so that Ned can attend the Left-Handed Convention, where he meets New York Yankees guest star Randy Johnson, who is selling left-handed teddy bears. With Marge spending so much time at The Flanders',Homer must look after Bart and Lisa. Homer takes the kids to an animal retirement home, but the trip goes awry when Toot-Toot the monkey pulls Bart into her cage and holds him hostage. Marge learns of the kidnapping when it is a breaking news report and she must figure out a way to get her son back.
While cave exploring with his family, Homer causes the cave to crumble and finds himself stuck upside down in the ceiling. Marge and Bart search for help while Lisa passes the time by telling Homer a story, which turns into a chain of narrated tales.
The Simpsons open up their home to Groundskeeper Willy after Bart accidentally destroys his house. But soon after his arrival, Willy's poor manners become the focus of a bet between Bart and Lisa, as she takes on the challenge of turning him into a proper gentleman. Meanwhile, Homer rips his favorite blue pants and starts an ambitious advertising campaign to reestablish the discontinued garment.
After Bart steals a key from Principal Skinner's office and gets himself into hot water, Marge and Homer send him to a "behavior modification camp." Homer is forced to cancel his much-anticipated trip to Las Vegas in order to drive Bart to the camp, but on the way there, Homer decides it's a great time to bond with Bart. Blackboard: 'Teacher was not dumped--it was mutual'.
Marge's rage against the new toll road system somehow leads to the discovery of a frozen mailman and his 40-year-old mail. The letters are returned to the rightful recipients, including one to Grandpa Simpson's deceased wife, revealing a secret love affair and the real father of her baby, Homer. Confused and emotional, Homer finds Mason Fairbanks, his wealthy and much improved paternal dad, and happily establishes a father-son relationship with him while rejecting his surrogate father of 40 years. But soon Homer realizes that a DNA test doesn't necessarily tell who his true father is. Blackboard 'I am not smarter than the president'.
The Simpsons deliver holiday cheer in this Christmas-themed trilogy. In The First -El, - when Reverend Lovejoy's car breaks down en route to Christmas mass, Homer takes over the sermon and delivers his version of the birth of Christ to his parents Joseph and Mary. - I Saw Grampa Cussing Santa Claus - finds Grampa reminiscing about his daredevil days as a WWII fighter pilot, when he was stranded on an island alongside his gunner, Burns. Grampa recalls mistaking Santa Claus for an enemy aircraft and gunning him down from the sky. Realizing their mistake, Grampa helps Jolly Ol' St. Nick to safety, only to have Burns steal the sleigh and escape the island - leaving Grampa stranded again. The final installment, -The Nutcracker - Sweet,- which finds the townspeople of Springfield preparing for Christmas Day, is set to the tune of the famed Nutcracker ballet.
After Mr. Burns crashes his Stutz Bearcat, he sends Homer and the family off to Italy to pick up his new fancy sport car. While on their Italian adventure, the Simpsons end up stranded in a small Italian village where a rehabilitated Sideshow Bob reigns as mayor. Sideshow Bob impresses the Simpsons enough so that they keep his sordid past a secret until one of the family members, in a wine-induced state, spills the beans.
Homer has an altercation with the Easter Bunny at the Mayor's egg hunt, causing Marge to be shunned. A lonely Marge decides to join a women's group called The Cheery Red Tomatoes and agrees to help with an upcoming charity drive - robbing Mr. Burns of his Faberge egg collection. Meanwhile, Lisa's plans to spend a summer in Italy hit a bump when she learns the first requirement is being fluent in Italian, so she takes on a teacher from a classified ad - who turns out to be Milhouse.
Homer's inability to embrace Lisa's Father's Day book the same way he does Bart's Father's Day Toolman causes Lisa to develop Ddd. Meanwhile, Bart steals the Bart Boulevard street sign and causes a huge pile-up. While Mayor Quimby creates The Safety Salamander spokesperson in response to the accident, the town still forces the ineffective Mayor into a recall election. Homer, longing to win back his daughter's love, takes the spokesperson position, and after a heroic run as The Safety Salamander, he runs for Mayor along with every other unqualified Springfieldian.
Observing that Marge is lonely, Bart offers to spend time with her. After they go on tandem bike rides and decorate Bart's tree house as a teahouse, the bullies from school dub Bart a mama's boy. When Marge finds out that Bart's schoolmates are teasing him, she gives him the necessary tools to win back his reputation. Meanwhile, Homer teams up with Moe and joins a professional arm-wrestling circuit .
It's time for all-new tricks and devilish treats on THE SIMPSONS annual Halloween trilogy, -Treehouse Of Horror XVI.- The fright-fest begins in - B.I.: Bartificial Intelligence - when the Simpsons adopt David, a newly developed artificial robot son, to replace Bart after he falls into a coma. In - Survival of the Fattest,- Mr. Burns invites Homer and his friends to his gigantic estate for a hunting tournament, but Homer and the gang learn they are the ones being the hunted on -The World Series Of Manhunter- hosted by Bradshaw. In the final Halloween scare, -I've Grown a Costume on Your Face,- a costume contest goes awry when a real witch turns all the Springfieldians into real-life versions of their costumes, leaving Maggie dressed like a witch with the only real power to reverse the spell.
Homer capitalizes on Maggie's chicken pox by throwing a "pox party" and charging parents to infect their children. Meanwhile, Milhouse soon realizes he was better off when his parents competed for his love, and launches "Operation Reverse Parent Trap" .
After protesting the construction of a stamp museum scheduled to be built on their neighboring lot, the Simpsons are dismayed when they discover that what they thought was a successful relocation of the museum to a cemetery lot turns into a creepy nightmare when that cemetery moves next door. When Lisa's sleepless nights become too much for Homer and Marge, they turn to a psychiatrist for advice. Meanwhile, Lisa chooses to face her fears dead-on by visiting the cemetery alone late one night.
Marge is outraged when she discovers Homer allowed Fat Tony to shoot a "gentleman's" film in their house to make restitution for his football gambling debt. So she takes off and leaves Homer with the kids. While on her journey of self-discovery, Marge befriends Caleb Thorn, an attractive marine biologist who is on a quest to save not only the endangered manatee, but Marge from a husband who doesn't seem to appreciate her. Blackboard 'Does anyone still do this anymore?'.
Bart is expelled from school after being accused of pulling a prank and sent to parochial school.
Financial trouble inspires Ned to rent his rumpus room to a pair of college-aged women, who end up running a soft-core webcam from the Flanders' home without their knowledge. When Ned becomes the laughingstock of Springfield and moves his family to their dream town, "Humble, PA - Home of the Humble Figurines," an unruly neighbor moves in, forcing Homer to beg for Flanders to return. Jason Bateman guest-stars as himself. Later, after Bart is falsely blamed and then expelled for a mishap at the school-sponsored Medieval festival, Fat Tony, guest-voiced by Joe Mantegna, suggests to Marge that he enroll in a private Catholic school. After a rough introduction with a nun on his first day, Bart meets and instantly likes an Eminem-quoting priest named Father Sean, guest-voiced by Neeson. Father Sean shows Bart the cooler parts of the religion through graphic stories and comic books. Bart's growing interest alarms his parents and ultimately drives Homer to visit the church. He, too, finds himself attracted to the religion after Father's offerings of beer, pancakes and games. It's up to Marge to bring her family back to their roots.
An apocalyptic movie followed by three real-life omens cause a fearful Homer to research the rapture. Believing that he has deduced when the event will happen, he begins warning others as a way to secure his spot in heaven. After a skeptical Kent Brockman reports on Homer's prediction of stars falling from the sky, there's a Krusty Special blimp accident, and Homer attracts a slew of new believers. When the rapture never comes, a discredited Homer discovers an error in his calculations and returns to the Springfield Mesa alone, where he experiences the rapture - or maybe a heat-induced dream - and convinces God to delay doomsday.
When Lisa agrees to participate in a Krusty-sponsored "Li'l Starmaker" competition, she panics when another contestant performs a better rendition of "Mockingbird." Thankfully, Homer saves the day by hammering out a manipulative tune about Springfield that leads Lisa to victory. With a win under his belt, Homer becomes a star-crazed stage father/manager, who ultimately drives Lisa to fire him. A distraught Homer counters by taking Lisa's rival, Cameron, under his wing to groom him for the finals.
Bart becomes addicted to junk food when a new vending machine is installed at Springfield Elementary. His steady diet of processed foods leads to a massive weight gain and health issues. When he's unable to stick to his prescribed low-fat diet, the Simpsons stage an intervention and ship Bart off to "Serenity Ranch - A Forced Starvation Facility," headed up by former food addict Tab Spangler. While Spangler tries to help Bart overcome his obsession, Homer and Marge turn their home into a hostel for German travelers in order to pay for the costly Serenity Ranch.
In the milestone 350th episode, Homer befriends beer-loving barfly and roofer Ray Magini, guest-voiced by Ray Romano. After discovering a shared passion for sandwiches and the Three Stooges, Homer and Ray become inseparable friends. However, Marge believes Ray is a figment of Homer's imagination and enlists the help of Dr. Hibbert to literally "shock" Ray Magini out of Homer's system.
When Professor Frink uses an astrology machine to ease the constant bickering between Bart and Lisa, they are given a sneak-peek into their final days of high school. In this future view, Marge and Homer are separated, Lisa is dating a muscular Milhouse and Bart is dating the girl of his dreams, Jenda, guest-voiced by Amy Poehler. Much to their disappointment, both the relationships quickly flounder. In hopes of winning Jenda back, Bart takes a job at a Kwik-E-Mart, where he becomes the local hero after saving Mr. Burns from a robber. His reward is a scholarship to Yale that was initially intended for Lisa. Bart's deeper look into the future causes him to have a change of heart, ultimately affecting his present-day sibling rivalry for the better.
To prove to Shelbyville that Springfield is not a hick town, Marge convinces the Springfield townspeople to fund a Frank Gehry- designed concert hall. Opening night turns disastrous after the sounds of Beethoven's Fifth Symphony drive the uninterested townspeople away, ultimately leading the hall to bankruptcy. Never one to miss an opportunity, Mr. Burns assumes the debt and turns the hall into the Montgomery Burns State Prison. Initially the prison proves to be a positive addition to the town, providing jobs to almost everyone except Homer, who is imprisoned after a lab test mix-up. Meanwhile at prison, Fat Tony puts a mark on Homer's head for being a snitch .
After Homer suffers a garage-door-to-the-throat incident, Marge is pressured into buying life insurance for the entire family. Much to her surprise, she finds out that Homer is uninsurable and resorts to cutting costs across the board in the household. Homer is convinced by his buddies that Marge is trying to make all financial decisions, so in an act of defiance, he buys an RV. This reckless act infuriates Marge, causing a divide between the two and ultimately forcing Homer to live in his new RV. Determined to save their feuding parents, Bart and Lisa steal the RV in hopes of returning it for a refund, but are instantly faced with obstacles.
After watching a video on menopause, hosted by guest voice Robert Wagner, Selma realizes that she missed her chance to have a baby and decides to adopt a baby girl from China. Selma encounters a bump in the road when the application asks for her husband's name. In an act of desperation, she puts down "Homer Simpson." Soon, Selma and the Simpsons are off to China to pick up her baby girl, while Homer must pretend to be her husband. When their charade is finally revealed, the functionary, Madam Yu, takes Selma's baby back. Homer and the gang must devise a plan to rescue the baby from the orphanage.
Fed up with Bart's endless taunting and torture, Lisa enlists the help of Chief Wiggum and files a restraining order against him. After watching a restraining order video hosted by guest voice Gary Busey, Bart learns he must stay 20 feet away from his sister. When he tries to contest it, Judge Harm increases it to 200 feet, forcing Bart to live in the back yard. Meanwhile, Homer takes over Grampa's job as a greeter at the Sprawl Mart.
One of Springfield's own comes out of the closet. To boost tourism, the town of Springfield decides to legalize same-sex marriage. Homer discovers the monetary value of gay union, becomes an ordained minister via the Internet and soon marries everyone and everything in town - including a surprising someone very close to him.
After sneaking out of the house to attend a 50 Cent concert and getting nabbed by Marge and Homer, Bart fakes his own kidnapping, hiding out in Kirk Van Houten's bachelor pad, to prevent being grounded. It is up to Springfield's finest - bumbling Police Chief Clancy Wiggum - to save him. Inspired by an apparition of Barney Fife, Wiggum cracks the case, rescues Bart and is promoted to Police Commissioner, while wrongly-imprisoned Kirk becomes a lady's man among the felon-loving singles of Springfield.
In THE SIMPSONS post-Super Bowl XXXIX episode, "Homer and Ned's Hail Mary Pass," after Homer inadvertently performs a wild crowd-pleasing dance at a local carnival, he is hired by several prolific sports figures - including Tom Brady, LeBron James, Warren Sapp, Yao Ming and Michelle Kwan, guest-starring as themselves - to choreograph their victory dances. After his dances prove successful, Homer is tapped to choreograph the Super Bowl halftime show. Panicked the night before the event, Homer enlists the help of his neighbor, Ned Flanders, and together they put on a nonviolent, deeply meaningful half-time show that America chastises for its blatant display of decency.
When Moe's Tavern is shut down by the health department, Homer refinances the house to save the bar. Infuriated by this, Marge decides to protect her investment and takes an active, hands-on role as Moe's partner. Marge gives the bar a facelift and boosts the clientele, while Homer has to stay home and play Mr. Mom. Meanwhile, Moe begins to develop deep feelings for his new partner.
When Mr. Burns terminates the employee prescription drug program, the citizens of Springfield are no longer able to afford their very expensive but much-needed prescription drugs. In order to keep the town medicated, Homer, Grampa, Apu and Flanders travel to Canada to buy the drugs with fake Canadian health care cards. When they are caught smuggling the goods, all of Springfield rallies around them to fight for their freedom.
When Bart writes slogans on t-shirts, he catches the attention of Goose Gladwell, a gag gift entrepreneur, and soon becomes a t-shirt mogul. With Bart now the breadwinner, Homer feels he no longer has a place in the family. In order to feel more useful, Homer begins spending more time with Lisa, including watching documentaries by scholar Declan Desmond. But when Gladwell is revealed as a fraud, Homer steps in to show him who's really boss. Blackboard 'My pen is not a booger launcher'.
Marge runs into her former high school pal Chloe Talbot, who is now a famous newscaster. Chloe is cultured, sharp-dressed and has a successful career on television. While Lisa has become enamored with Chloe's worldliness, Marge becomes jealous and wonders if she made the right decision by choosing family over a career. Blackboard 'Poking a dead raccoon is not research'.
Feeling unappreciated by her own children, Marge takes in neglected son and Springfield Elementary School bully Nelson Muntz. Horrified his tormentor is now living under the same roof, Bart goes on a mission to find Nelson's parents and reunite the Muntzes.
When Bart fishes Homer's vintage "Playdude" magazines out of the trash, he decides to adopt the ring-a-ding-ding lifestyle of the 1970s, as interpreted by a 10-year-old. Looking for some action, actor James Caan, guest-starring as himself, drops by Bart's swinging Playdude treehouse. Meanwhile, Marge stoops to sabotage to keep up with the other contestants during the Ovenfresh Bakeoff, attended by the likes of.
Hands out its annual Halloween treats on the "Treehouse of Horror XV" special featuring three deliciously frightful mini-episodes. In "The Ned Zone," Ned Flanders gains the power of foretelling people's deaths after suffering a head injury, and is shocked to discover that he will be the one to kill Homer. In the second short, "In the Belly of the Boss," Maggie is shrunken inside a vitamin capsule in a freak science accident and is swallowed by Mr. Burns. The final Halloween scare, "Four Beheadings and a Funeral," is set in Victorian London, where Master Detective Eliza Simpson and her faithful sidekick, Dr. Bartley, attempt to catch The Muttonchop Murderer, a Jack the Ripper-esque serial killer.
Mr. Burns buys all the media outlets in town after everyone thinks he is dead and does not care. Lisa starts her own newspaper and ends up in a war with Burns.
Marge and Homer work hard to get Bart to the doctor for a shot, he then goes deaf as a side effect. Later he is bending over doing a full moon and accidentally moons the American Flag and the Dante basket ball classic during the national anthem.
After Bart and Milhouse play a game of Spin the Bottle in the tree house, Homer tells the story of his and Marge's first kiss. Marge and Homer then learn they were destined to be together.
Avenging a slight to Lisa turns Homer into the city's new crusader for justice, a masked man whose weapon of choice is a pie in the face.
Grandpa, Bart and Lisa Simpson take off on a cross country journey when Homer and Marge just want to spend a bit of kid free time.
Skinner's cold feet near the altar also give Edna second thoughts, leading her into a rebound romance.
Sarah Michelle Gellar plays a delinquent whom Bart meets in a juvenile-correction facility that's not strong enough to hold them.
After a winery tour, Marge and Homer become drinking pals, until a driving mishap prompts one to pull a fast one on the other.
Lisa finds Arte Ziff living in their attic after seeing a horror movie with Homer and Bart. Artie moves in because he owes massive amounts of money to his company shareholders. Blackboard reads 'I will not speculate on how hot teacher used to be'.
Simon Cowell plays an admissions interviewer at a prestigious pre-nursery school where Maggie's IQ is found to surpass Lisa's, causing an identity crisis for the older sister.
Bart bonds with Lisa after Milhouse and his mom move to Capital City; Homer panhandles to buy Marge's anniversary gift.
Marge talks history, with Homer as Henry VIII, Lenny and Carl as Lewis and Clark, Lisa as an opinionated Sacagawea and Bart as Mozart.
Tom Clancy, Thomas Pynchon and the Olsen twins have cameos as Marge writes a novel that casts Homer in a bad light, and Flanders in a good one.
Unable to build Bart a working robot for TV's "Robot Rumble," Homer becomes the robot by hiding inside, taking beatings, but giving better.
Maggie is among the babies who riot at a kiddie concert, prompting a backlash by single childless citizens, who organize against kids and families.
A version of "A Christmas Carol" causes Homer to go from greedy to giving, prompting jealousy in Flanders, who gives gifts to everyone in town.
Krusty's rabbi father helps him prepare for his bar mitzvah, which includes Mr. T; Homer guest hosts for Krusty and is a hit. Dan Castellaneta, Blackboard reads 'over forty & single is not funny'.
Homer goes on a mission of revenge against a bear that attacked him during a visit to the dump and creates a home made bear-fighting suit. Blackboard 'My pen is not a booger launcher'.
Prime Minister Tony Blair welcomes the Simpsons to England, where they run into author J.K. Rowling and actor Ian McKellan.
Lisa is made to look like Eva Peron in this loose parody as faculty members undermine her student-body presidency.
Surfacing to see her son, Homer's fugitive mom is caught and tried for sabotaging a lab owned by Mr. Burns, who's loath to let a grudge die.
A Halloween trilogy (XIV), with Jennifer Garner, Oscar De La Hoya and Jerry Lewis as Professor Frink's father, who goes on a rampage after being brought back from the dead. Homer kills death in the first tale and has to become the grim reaper; In the Second tale Professor Frink wins a Nobel prize and then brings his father back from the dead in a Frankenstein parody; in the 3rd tale Bart gets access to a watch that changes the fabric of existence and along with Milhouse they cause trouble in Springfield.
Homer and Marge permit Moe to baby sit Maggie and she takes a shine to Moe, which causes Homer to become jealous.
Busted for a prank gone awry, Milhouse and Bart are enrolled in different youth groups that become heated rivals. Blackboard reads 'sandwiches should not contain sand'.
Homer has his drivers license revoked by Judge Harm which forces Marge to do all the driving for the family.
When Homer is trapped, the dog ignores him and he is saved by the cat. Homer then says he has no dog. H.K. Duff, owner of Duff beer makes the Simpsons dog, Santa's Little Helper the Duff mascot. Blackboard reads 'my pen is not a booger launcher'.
Musician David Byrne offers to produce the song that Homer wrote about how much he dislikes his neighbor Ned Flanders. The Simpsons then go to a Dude Ranch where Lisa meets a special boy.
While looking for a puzzle piece, Homer comes across a letter Marge wrote about how upset she was with Homer right before they were married. He thinks she married him because she became pregnant with Bart and moves out.
Lisa searches for a steady career after a British filmmaker makes her feel inadequate and decides on astronomy.
Homer's stint in a success workshop gives him new initiative, but Mr. Burns' lack of appreciation prompts Homer to plot revenge, which results in a takeover of the power plant.
Hoping to reroute air traffic over their house, the Simpsons ask Krusty to run for Congress, where the successful clown finds more of his kind.
Ned becomes lonely when all the Springfield family's spend a day at the beach with their significant others and ends up dating an actor.
Spelling champ Lisa makes the Spellympics, where host George Plimpton proposes a deal; Homer joins a traveling fan club for a new Krusty food product.
While doing spring cleaning, Lisa comes across a video cassette of a add Bart did as baby "Stink Breath". Bart gets so mad about Homer having spent his earnings from the add that he asks the court to emancipate him from the family. Blackboard reads 'I will not'.
Jealous of Ned Flanders winning money at a sports event, Homer starts praying to God for good things to happen then develops a hedonistic lifestyle. Blackboard reads 'Spongebob is not a contraceptive'.
After she is mugged, Marge retreats to the basement to lift weights. She then becomes obsessed with body building. Marge starts entering contests and her disposition changes as she gets stronger. Blackboard reads 'This school does not need a "regime change"'.
Homer feels bad because he does not know much about Lisa so he hires a private detective to spy on her. He then becomes a big hit with her because of the information.
Bart feels sorry for Mrs. Krabappel after she is stood up by Principle Skinner, so he nominates her for an award.
Someone's trying to kill Homer, so Chief Wiggum consults an expert: Sideshow Bob, who moves in with the Simpsons to shadow Homer.
The Simpsons end up with termites after going to a hockey game and have to stay out of their house for 6 months. They end up on a reality series where they live in a 1880's type house and life style. Blackboard: 'Milhouse did not test cootie positive'.
Marge gets breast implants meant for Mayor Quimby's young girlfriend; Bart and Milhouse spot Krusty the Clown on a old episode of Batman.
After testing, Lisa is moved up a grade and Bart is held back so they are both in the 3rd grade together. The teacher thinks Bart is the smarter of the two since he already knows everything. They go on a field trip to Capital City and get left behind and lost. Blackboard 'Fish do not like Coffee'.
Mick Jagger, Keith Richards, Tom Petty, Elvis Costello, Lenny Kravitz and Brian Setzer are the teachers when Homer attends a rock-and-roll fantasy camp.
"Treehouse of Horror XIII" finds Homer cloned; Dr. Hibbert turning the family into half animals; and Springfield invaded by zombie cowboys.
Homer starts a security company that ultimately replaces the cops---and runs afoul of mobster Fat Tony
Homer's community service for threatening an endangered species involves helping a kindly senior, who meets an untimely death.
Lisa becomes friends with college girls who are unaware of her age. Bart is bitten by a Chinese mosquito and must live in a bubble. Bart and Lisa also share a special moment.
Homer accidentally walks in on Apu when he is cheating on his wife at the Kwiki Mart.
Encouraged by comic-book guru Stan Lee (in a cameo), Bart creates a strip about Homer that gets onto the Internet.
The Springfield Friars Club roasts Homer, with emcee Krusty the Clown introducing friends, family and their memories from past episodes.
Homer uses medicinal marijuana to relieve pain from eye injuries he suffered when attacked by crows.
Homer refuses to pay a really high phone bill then their service is shut off. The family travels to Rio De Janeiro to see Lisa's sponsored orphan.
Homer discovers a library book he checked out when Bart was born and Lisa suggests that he read aloud from it. Blackboard: 'Vampire is not a career choice'.
Grampa Simpson regains his driver's license to woo a new woman but is goaded into a race by senior punks.
Bart and Lisa try to help an old cowboy actor, who yearns to reclaim his past fame by getting him booked on the Krusty the Clown show.
Bart ends up becoming close friends with Greta Wolfecastle after a fun fair and he has a blind eye to her feelings about him. Blackboard: 'The giving tree is not a chump'.
Now fabulously wealthy, Marge's grabby prom date Artie Ziff offers a million dollars for a weekend with her that, he says, will have "no funny stuff." The Simpsons agree when they realize the money will help their marriage---by paying for an operation that will cure Homer's snoring.
When Homer accidentally breaks his jaw, he has to have it wired shut and can not talk. He learns to become the good listener that Marge has wanted.
Ben Stiller plays a sugar company's CEO who draws Marge's ire after Springfield is declared the "World's Fattest Town."
Grampa comes to Homer's rescue after Ned and His Vegas wives show up at the house.
In this Christmas episode, Richard Gere offers Buddhist teachings to Lisa after she leaves her church because of Mr. Burns' tacky fund-raising efforts, which include commercials (during sermons) and podium-placed ads. Blackboard: 'I do not have a cereal named after me'.
Marge becomes obsessed with a brand of paper towels and Homer pulls a gag on her. To make up for it, Homer takes her out, gets hypnotized and regresses to a childhood fear and starts screaming and does not stop until the source of the fear is drawn out of him. Blackboard 'I am not Charlie Brown on acid'.
Homer is hired to write fortunes for fortune cookies, one of them changes Mr. Burn's life. Homer helps Mr. Burns with his dating. Blackboard: 'Fun does not have a size'.
Moe gets more depressed than usual and renovates his tavern. He then kicks the old gang out and Homer opens a bar in his garage so the gang can have a place to hang out and fit in.
Bart is tethered to Homer as punishment for stealing a police cruiser. Blackboard 'Nobody reads these anymore!'.
"Treehouse of Horror XII" includes Pierce Brosnan as the voice of a computerized house that falls for Marge; a Gypsy's curse bringing bad luck to Homer's loved ones; and Bart and Lisa as competing wizards, with Bart enlisting help from a dark source.
Folk-tale parodies abound, with Homer as Paul Bunyan; Lisa as Connie Appleseed; and Bart as Tom Sawyer, helping to save Huck Finn from a shotgun marriage to Becky Thatcher. Blackboard: 'I should not be twenty-one by now'.
Homer opens a day-care center in the house, prompting envy in Lisa and Bart when he treats other kids better than he treats them. Blackboard 'Today is not Mothra's day'.
With Homer's help, Ned Flanders tries to establish a Christian theme park based on drawings in his deceased wife's sketch book. Blackboard: 'Genetics is not an excuse'.
Homer's severed thumb, Lisa's science project and Bart's discovery of fireworks prompt separate but simultaneous adventures that conclude with an encounter with mobster Fat Tony. Blackboard: 'Fire is not the cleanser'.
Hungry Homer rips into a 30 year old box of animal crackers and finds a winning ticket for a trip to Africa. He then demands his prize. Blackboard: 'I will not flush evidence'.
A new girl joins the elementary class and Lisa tries to figure out why she is bullying everyone. Homer goes on a mission to baby proof Springfield. Blackboard: 'I will not scare the vice president'.
The family goes to Blocko land, Homer stands up to a guy for Lisa. Homer then proceeds to go on a hunger strike protesting a decision the Springfield Isotopes baseball teams owner is in the process of making.
After Bart pulls a stunt during the Springfield Marathon, Lt. Smash boy-band creator recruits Bart, Nelson, Milhouse and Ralph to create a boy band. NSYNC visit's Springfield. Blackboard 'I will not buy a presidential pardon'.
Sideshow Bob talks his way out of prison and into a job at the school. There, he hypnotizes Bart---to make him kill Krusty, who plans a final show after growing sick of network interference. Blackboard 'The hamster did not have "A Full Life"'.
The Simpsons win points for their new tennis court, but constantly lose on Homer's poor play. Blackboard 'I will not publish the principal's credit report'.
Bart and Milhouse are at the Android Dungeon and end up being banned from the store for a lifetime. After Comic Book Guy has a heart attack, Bart and Milhouse take over running the store for him. Once Comic Book Guy recovers, he starts dating Principle Skinners mother. Blackboard 'I will not hide the teacher's medication'.
Homer hurts his back at a prison rodeo, where Marge meets an artistic inmate whom she takes under her wing. Blackboard 'I will not "Let The Dogs Out!"''
Researchers find and fix the cause of Homer's "subnormal" intelligence, but Homer finds life as a brain is a drain on his popularity. Blackboard 'Network TV is not dead'.
A blizzard traps Skinner and Groundskeeper Willie with an assortment of students at Springfield Elementary. Bart (of course) leads the revolt.
Homer and Bart turn into a couple of con artists in order to pay for a really high car repair bill. Blackboard 'The nurse is not dealing'.
After having to go to work because he did not get the email about the day off, Homer buys a computer and starts a tell all web page. He then wins a award for the web site. Blackboard 'I will only provide a urine sample when asked'.
With Smithers away, Burns hires a cash-hungry Homer as his "prank monkey" to perform stunts that ultimately damage Homer's dignity. Leeza Gibbons has a cameo. Blackboard 'I was not the sixth Beattle'.
Joshua Jackson plays a committed---and cute---teen environmentalist who inspires Lisa to take up residence in a redwood tree to save it from destruction. Blackboard 'I am not the acting President'.
While Krusty is signing autographs, Bart meets a girl who turns out to be Krusty's daughter. Krusty then spends a day at the beach with her and later that night he gambles away his daughter Sophie's violin. He then recruits Homer to help him get it back from Fat Tony and the Mob. Blackboard 'I will not surprise the incontinent'.
Homer gets frustrated because Springfield now has to area codes for phone calls and he divides the Town, becomes mayor of New Springfield. He then wages war against Olde Springfield and it is up to The Who to reunite the town.
In the 11th annual Halloween trilogy, a ghostly Homer tries to perform a good deed on Earth; Bart and Lisa are trapped in a fairy-tale forest; and dolphins revolt against humans after Lisa frees their king from the Springfield Marine Park.
A clip show like episode of behinds the scenes as if Simpsons were a real family doing unanimated tv.
Otto's girlfriend seems to be usurping Marge's role when she moves in with the family after a dispute over heavy metal.
Bart and Milhouse camp out in a shopping mall for a week and drive Chief Wiggam crazy, while Lisa enrolls in a tap dance school run by a former child star who is full of herself.
In Florida, Homer gets caught up in spring break partying and accidentally runs over "Captain Jack" a iconic swamp alligator and the family has to go on the lam. Blackboard: "I am not here on a fartball scholarship".
Barney quits drinking to take helicopter-flying lessons, leaving Homer feeling resentful and inferior; Lisa and Bart enter a contest to photograph the cover of the Springfield phone book.
Bart attempts to sneak into an Indian casino by replacing the ventriloquist dummy and the head of the casino shows him the future when Lisa is President of the United States.
Moe wins Duff's "beer-tending" contest but loses out on making their calendar. So he undergoes plastic surgery and lands a soap-opera role that he missed years before.
Homer is forced to become a missionary on a remote island after he pledges a large sum of money to a local PBS station.
The Simpsons go on a nature hike and Marge discovers that the bird preserve she loves has been turned into a racetrack. During the race a bad accident happens causing someone to pass away, the Simpsons console a grieving friend.
The band Bachman Turner Overdrive preforms at the State Fair. Bart and Homer rescue a horse from the State fair. Homer then starts racing the horse with Bart as the Jockey. Later, Homer discovers a secret about horse jockeys. Lisa's school band competes in a band contest and the winning school band cheats. Lisa then writes a letter to the President of the USA.
The Simpsons have to take care of Mr. Burn's mansion while he is at the Mayo Clinic getting a checkup. Homer takes advantage of it. Blackboard 'Class Clown is not a paid position'.
After Bart's successful laying on of hands at a revival meeting, a preacher declares Bart has "the power." So the boy pitches his own tent. Blackboard: 'I will stop phoning it in'.
With Marge laid up by a skiing (lodge) accident, Lisa tries to run the house and plays a trick on Homer and Bart to get them to help clean. Blackboard: 'I will not create art from dung'.
Bankrupt Springfield Elementary is taken over by a private outfit whose members' real goal is to mine the kids' minds for toy ideas. Blackboard ' I will not sell my kidney on Ebay.'.
Homer wins a motorcycle and starts his own gang. The he gets entangled with a real motorcycle gang and they kidnap Marge. Blackboard "I can't see dead people".
Feeling more stressed than blessed after the birth of their octuplets, Apu and Manjula get child-care help in a deal they come to regret.
Homer cuts out of work to bowl a perfect game then has trouble staying in the limelight afterwords.
Homer thinks dueling is great and because of that, the Simpsons end up having to move to a old farm and Homer grows a highly addictive crop after fertilizing the field with plutonium.
A Halloween trilogy: Homer causes a Y2K catastrophe; superheroes Lisa and Bart save actress Lucy Lawless; Marge runs Flanders over, and Homer tries to cover it up. Dick Clark and Tom Arnold also appear as themselves.
After crashing a food critic's retirement party for the food, Homer ends up taking the lady's place as food critic. He then has Lisa proofread his column and the power goes to his head. The French chef bakes him a very special eclair because of his bad reviews. Blackboard 'I am not the last Don'.
A drug for Attention Deficit Disorder makes Bart studious, productive---and paranoid about satellites spying on him. Blackboard 'Pork is not a Verb'.
Mel Gibson brings the Simpsons to Hollywood so Homer can help "tweak" his new film after Homer's is the sole negative voice at a test screening. First tweak: add action, and lots of it.
After getting tips on thrifty living, the family takes a vacation to Japan, where they appear on a game show to win plane tickets back home. Blackboard: 'I'm so very tired'.
Lisa is invited to join local members of Mensa, who take a complaint to City Hall---and wind up running it. Blackboard: 'No one wants to hear from my armpits.'.
After another billionaire makes a memorable impression on Springfield, Burns asks for Homer's help on a quest for popularity, which eventually takes them both to Scotland.
Bart puts on a show that causes Springfield to loose hosting the Olympic Games. For punishment, he is forced to volunteer at Grandpa's retirement home.
Isabella Rossellini plays a gallery owner who sees art in the concrete mess that results from Homer's attempt at building a barbeque. After the piece sells, she arranges a one-man show. Blackboard: 'A trained ape could not teach gym'.
The family's biblical dreams include Homer and Marge as Adam and Eve, with Flanders as God; Milhouse as Moses; and Bart as David battling Goliath's son ("this time, it's personal").
Truck drivers target Homer after he blabs about an industry scam while filling in for a recently deceased driver.
Homer damages the bill of rights at the museum and gives away Lisa's room to compensate for it. Lisa has to move in with Bart. Marge discover that Maggie's baby monitor is picking up local phone calls. Blackboard: 'I do not have diplomatic immunity'.
Marge gets a new sports utility vehicle and develops a bad case of road rage. She then has to go to driving school. Blackboard: 'Grammar is not a time of waste'.
Apu invites Homer and Marge over to his house for dinner and Manjula finds out that most American men do not work 7 days a week 12 plus hours a day and flips out. Apu then begins a series of daily gifts leading up to Valentines day for Manjula which causes all the other wives in Springfield to get Jealous of the attention she is getting from Apu. This causes the men of Springfield to be in the doghouse with their wives and them to be mad at Apu.
Homer discovers a cool Tv character with his name and then they turn the character into a dummy and Homer becomes mortified. He then changes his name and a lot of things change for him.
Homer leads a slew of Springfield denizens to the Super Bowl. Blackboard: 'I will not do the dirty bird'.
Wiggum declares a curfew for kids, who are being blamed for school vandalism committed by a drunken Homer and friends. Blackboard: 'Sherri does not "Get Back"'.
Ned is feeling depressed and Homer talks him into going to Las Vegas. After arriving, they spend a wild night on the town and wake up married to two Las Vegas wives. Blackboard: 'My mom is not dating Jerry Seinfeld'.
Homer becomes the mayor's bodyguard and puts a stop to a crooked operation involving Fat Tony, who vows revenge on the mayor.
Homer takes the family on a trip and does not stop on the way home so Grandpa Simpson can go to the bathroom. This results in Grandpa needing a kidney transplant and Homer has compatible kidney's with his dad.
Lisa gets sick then does not study and ends up buying test answers from Nelson.
In a quest to discover his middle name, Homer meets some of his mothers old hippie friends. He then starts to live a hippy lifestyle.
Homer becomes an assistant to Kim Basinger and Alec Baldwin (and their houseguest, Ron Howard), none of whom are interested in his screenplay. Blackboard: 'Butt-Butt is not my email address'.
The ninth Halloween show. Included: Homer turns evil after a hair transplant; Bart and Lisa get trapped inside their TV; the alien Kang is revealed as Maggie's father.
After an accident with a gun, Bart becomes the caretaker of the eggs from a birds nest.
Homer goes through a bought of midlife depression and tries to overcome it with a string of inventions inspire by Thomas Edison.
A hip new student makes an impression at Springfield Elementary; Homer drags Bart into grease recycling.
Homer and Marge try to find ways to spice up their love life by experimenting with risky locals. Blackboard: 'I was not the inspiration for "Kramer"'.
Lisa tricks Homer into giving her permission to take the bus downtown alone---then she gets lost. Blackboard; 'I am not the new Dali Lama'.
Homer gets in shape (no, really!) and climbs a mountain to promote the alleged health-food product that helped him achieve success.
Homer becomes head of the Springfield Sanitation department and makes outrageous promises that he can't keep. Homer also disrupts a U2 concert.
Lisa becomes the anchor for a kids news show when Krusty's producers try to spice up his program. Bart takes over the show when he is made co-anchor of the program.
Homer gets in trouble with the IRS for his taxes and has to get proof that Burns has money the government wants for them in return.
When Homer comes up with a not so bright idea at work involving a donut and the nuclear core, Mr. Burns fires him. He then decides to join the Naval Reserve when Lisa tells him that she would be proud of him if he did. Later a nuclear-sub captain puts naval reservist Homer in command during war games. Blackboard: "My butt does not deserve a website".
Marge orders Bart to play with Ralph Wiggum, an appalling task---until Bart gets hold of Chief Wiggum's master key to the city. Blackboard: 'I was not told to do this'.
Grandpa says "Simpson genes" are behind Lisa's sudden lack of brain power; Jasper tries to live for the future in the Kwik-E-Mart freezer.
Moe finally finds a woman to date, then has Homer help him with a insurance scam to get more money to spend on her. Blackboard: 'Silly string is not a nasal spray'.
Krusty makes a fool of himself at the Springfield Comedy Festival and decides to retire. Once at the retirement ceremony he discovers how to make people laugh.
A bus accident strands Bart, Lisa and their classmates on an island; Homer starts a business on the Internet.
Homer is talked into joining a cult at the airport. The cult promises to take people to another planet. Marge has to work hard to get through the brainwashing. Blackboard: 'Shooting paintballs is not an art form'.
Homer and Bart become carnival workers, and take in two fellow carnies whose crooked game is closed by Chief Wiggum.
Homer rents Paint Your Wagon with Lee Marvin and Clint Eastwood expecting a Shoot 'Em up western. He is so disappointed about it that Marge and Lisa have to try and cheer him up.
After accidentally destroying the Simpsons' Christmas gifts, Bart claims a burglar stole them, and Springfield responds generously to that false news. Blackboard: 'Rudolph's red nose is not alcohol-related'.
Marge gets a realtor's license and goes to work---for Lionel Hutz, who finds her honesty a dubious asset. Meanwhile, Homer buys a hot rod at a police auction, but the incarcerated former owner protests. Blackboard "There was no Roman God named 'Fartacus' ".
While digging at a construction site, Lisa finds bones that everyone thinks are the bones of a angel.
Apu tries to wriggle out of a marriage prearranged by his mother years in the past to a woman that he does not remember.
Homer heckles Flanders out of coaching Pee Wee football---and then takes over, replacing winning QB Nelson with Bart.
Homer buys a gun, but after a few mishaps, Marge demands he get rid of it. When he doesn't, she leaves with the kids. Blackboard: 'Everyone is tired of that Richard Gere story'.
In a Halloween trilogy, nuclear survivor Homer battles mutants; Bart is morphed with a fly; Marge is accused of being a witch in 1649.
The story of how Lisa got her sax includes Bart's first day at school, his visit to the school psychologist and a heat wave in Springfield.
Principal Skinner is given a achievement award and in the middle of the ceremony a man who claims to be the real Seymour Skinner shows up.
Homer has to take his family to New York city for a madcap adventure after Barney goes on a bender and leaves Homer's car illegally parked at the World Trade Center.
Lisa joins the all-male military school where Bart is sent for discipline. Then comes the hazing.
Three mock spin-offs: "Chief Wiggum, P.I."; "The Love-Matic Grandpa"; and "The Simpson Family Smile-Time Variety Hour," with guest star Tim Conway and a teen stand-in for Lisa.
A new plant employee who's had it tough resents Homer's lack of professionalism and his cushy life. Meanwhile, Bart buys an abandoned factory at an auction for a dollar.
Reverend Lovejoy puts Marge in charge of counseling parishioners; Homer finds his likeness is popular in Japan as the symbol for a cleaning product.
Penniless from bad investments, Burns asks for help from Lisa, who turns him into a profitable recycler. But then Burns takes things a nasty step further to increase his dividends.
Bart replaces Santa's Little Helper with a "limited edition" dog he bought with a fraudulent credit card. Blackboard: 'A fire drill does not demand a fire'.
After witnessing a kiss between Skinner and Mrs. Krabappel, Bart becomes their confidante. But rumors of their passion lead to their being fired---until Skinner reveals a secret.
Homer becomes a bootlegger when Springfield decides to enforce a 200-year-old prohibition decree.
Lisa's reputation as a first-rate baby sitter is jeopardized when she's put in charge of Bart, who's determined to make things tough.
Murderous convict Sideshow Bob (Kelsey Grammer) is released to work for his brother Cecil (David Hyde Pierce), whom Bob bested at the Krusty-sidekick audition.
Homer's fearful about the potential influence that the Simpsons' new gay friend may have on Bart.
Itchy and Scratchy creator Roger Myers picks Homer to be the voice of a new canine character---who is roundly rejected by the public.
When Marge suffers stress-related hair loss, the Simpsons hire nanny Shary Bobbins, who speaks in song and inspires others to do so. But the Simpsons may prove too much for her. Blackboard: 'I will not hide the teacher's prozac'.
On a company mountain retreat, an avalanche traps hiking partners Homer and Mr. Burns in a cabin.
A smooth talker sells Marge on the pretzel business. But when sales go soft, Homer asks crime boss Fat Tony for help. Blackboard "I am not licensed to do anything".
Homer's claim of an alien sighting brings FBI agents Scully and Mulder to investigate. Blackboard: 'The truth is not out there'.
Chief Wiggum's chili peppers send Homer on a hallucinatory, spiritual journey that makes him question whether Marge is his soulmate.
Citizens rebuild the Flanders' hurricane-damaged house. But Ned's guilt about criticizing their work sends him to a mental hospital.
Lisa develops a crush on Nelson, and then she tries to change him. Meanwhile, Homer solicits money over the phone using an automatic telephone dialer.
Milhouse's parents decide to divorce, prompting Homer to take action to prevent a similar fate for himself and Marge.
While Marge and Lisa are away, Bart becomes the right-hand man for the owner of a burlesque house.
Rodney Dangerfield is the voice of Mr. Burns' illegitimate son, who irritates Burns with his lack of social graces. Homer and Mr. Burn's son hatch a scheme to get Mr. Burns's attention.
Moe turns Homer into a prizefighter, who meets the champ in a bout called by ring announcer Michael Buffer.
In an idyllic planned community, Homer works for a new boss who has trouble with the government. Meanwhile, the rest of the family has difficulty dealing with the bucolic burg. Blackboard: 'I did not learn everything I need to know in kindergarten'.
A Halloween trilogy. This time, Bart meets his "pure evil" Siamese twin; Lisa's science project attacks Bart; aliens Kang and Kodos invade Clinton and Dole's replicas just before the 1996 Presidential election.
On vacation, Lisa plays dumb to make friends with the "cool" kids, leaving a jealous Bart all burned up, with Milhouse as his only comrade.
Homer goes on tour with Hullabalooza, a rock concert featuring sideshow acts. His talent: catching a cannonball with his belly.
Marge and Homer support a proposal to deport illegal immigrants from Springfield---until they learn it would affect Apu, who buys fraudulent identification documents from Fat Tony (voice of Joe Mantegna).
Mr. Burns tries to kill Grampa Simpson to seize a treasure the two found during World War II as members of the "Flying Hellfish" battalion.
Interconnecting vignettes depict moments in the lives of Springfield residents, including Apu's partying activities; Smithers' allergic reaction to a bee sting; and Dr. Nick's appearance before a medical review board.
Bart drives Milhouse, Martin and Nelson to Tennessee, thanks to his fake ID and Martin's cash from a stock dividend.
Selma dates Troy McClure, whose agent (voice of Jeff Goldblum) reports that being seen in public with a woman is a career boost that could make people forget "that scandal at the aquarium."
Bart wants justice done after learning that the animator (voice of Kirk Douglas) who created Itchy was ripped off. Lionel Hutz takes the animator's case.
Homer succumbs to job stress while subbing for Smithers as Burns' assistant.
Lisa's research on Jebediah Springfield turns up some unknown---and unpopular---facts.
Bart inadvertently alerts the IRS to tax fraud by Krusty, whose possessions are auctioned off by the Government.
Marge's new designer suit nets her an invitation to the Springfield Country Club, where she finds it's a stress to dress to impress. Meanwhile, "natural" golfer Homer hits the links with Mr. Burns.
Homer is irked by his new neighbors, former U.S. President George Bush and Former U.S. First Lady Barbara Bush, especially when Mr. Bush gives Bart a spanking and criticizes Homer's parenting for menacing and ruined to have the outboard motor to damage Former President George Bush's new memoirs that he was working in his autobiography.
Homer, Moe, Apu and Otto form a bowling team; Bart's prank leads Springfield Elementary to adopt school uniforms. Blackboard: 'I am not certified to remove asbestos'.
Busted for shoplifting, Bart manages to keep the incident quiet---until he returns to the store for the Simpsons' Christmas portrait. And the news is devastating to Marge. Blackboard: 'I will stop talking about the twelve inch pianist'.
Troy McClure hosts a retrospective featuring Simpsons history and trivia, and series "outtakes," including an alternate ending to the "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" episode and a burping contest between Barney and baseball's Wade Boggs.
Sideshow Bob (voice of Kelsey Grammer) steals an atomic bomb and demands that Springfield abolish television. Blackboard: 'Wedgies are unhealthy for children and other living things'.
Homer comes face-to-face with his long-lost mother (voice of Glenn Close)---who reveals why she abandoned him.
Homer purposely gains weight to qualify for disability, disdaining Marge's complaints and the fact that she's losing interest in him physically. Blackboard: 'Indian burns are not our cultural heritage'.
Halloween 1996: Homer tumbles into another dimension in a story spun off "The Twilight Zone"; Paul Anka helps combat the "Attack of the 50-Foot Eyesores"; and Groundskeeper Willie appears in a spoof of "A Nightmare on Elm Street."
Vegetarian Lisa ruins Homer's barbecue, but she gets moral support from Apu and his friends, Paul and Linda McCartney.
Bart sells his soul to Milhouse for five bucks; Moe goes after the family crowd. Blackboard 'I am not a lean mean spitting machine.'.
Innocent mishaps draw the attention of investigators, who put the Simpson kids in a foster home---the Flanders'. Blackboard: 'No one want's to hear from my armpits'.
Bart auditions for the part of Fallout Boy in the movie "Radioactive Man," being filmed in Springfield. Blackboard: 'Bewitched does not support satanism'.
Chief Wiggum conducts an investigation into who shot Mr. Burns in an episode that parodies TV dramas, including "Dallas," "Twin Peaks" and "The Fugitive." Blackboard: 'I will not complain about the solution when I hear it'.
Mr. Burns makes many enemies when he steals the oil discovered beneath Springfield Elementary. Blackboard: 'This is not a clue...or is it?'.
Springfield boys try to recapture the town's beloved lemon tree after it's stolen.
Marge joins the police force after thwarting a criminal, and Homer thinks he now has a free ride as a cop's spouse. Blackboard: 'I will not mock Mrs. Dumbface'.
Bart winds up in the hospital as a result of eating Krusty cereal, and when Lisa comes to visit him, she is reunited with her sax idol, who recounts his big break on "The Tonight Show.". Blackboard: 'Nerve gas is not a toy'.
Bart helps precipitate a teachers strike, but he rues his handiwork when Marge takes over for Mrs. Krabapple. Blackboard: 'I do not have power of attorney over first graders'.
The Simpson household's overrun with puppies---the offspring of Santa's Little Helper and his new girlfriend from which Mr. Burns would love to make a greyhound-skin tuxedo.
A fortuneteller predicts Lisa's engagement and wedding to a fellow student (Mandy Patinkin) from an upper-crust British family.
Film critic Jay Sherman (Jon Lovitz) is among the judges at the Springfield Film Festival, which Mr. Burns conspires to win by bribing some judges.
A loan from Patty and Selma makes Homer their slave; Bart is forced to take ballet.
After tricking an Australian boy into accepting a collect call, Bart flies Down Under to apologize. Blackboard: 'I will not hang donuts on my person'.
Homer graduates from Krusty's Clown College and becomes a target for the clown's bookie. Blackboard: 'Next time it could be me on the scaffolding'.
A comet is hurtling toward Springfield, so the Simpsons take refuge in a bomb shelter---Flanders'.
Homer recalls his days as a debt-free dad of two---until Marge got pregnant with Maggie.
Homer becomes the leader of a secret club, but his power is undermined by a "spiritual emptiness." Blackboard: 'Adding "Just kidding" doesn't make it okay to insult the principal'.
Marge sees a psychiatrist (Anne Bancroft) to explore her fear of flying and learns that her father may be the key. Blackboard: 'Ralph won't "morph" if you squeeze him hard enough'.
Grandpa's homemade tonic puts life back in the Simpson bedroom, so he and Homer hit the road to sell the stuff. Blackboard: 'My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man'.
A baby sitter accuses Homer of sexual harassment. Dennis Franz has a voice cameo.
Lisa's surprising ability at hockey spawns jealousy in Bart and a showdown when their teams meet.
Bart learns that the good Rev. Lovejoy's daughter (voice of Meryl Streep) is really bad. Blackboard: 'I will not send lard through the mail'.
Frightfest '94: Lack of beer and cable TV make Homer a crazed killer; the present is altered by a time-traveling Homer; and Principal Skinner turns detention students into food.
Mayor Quimby pardons attempted murderer Sideshow Bob (Kelsey Grammer), who then runs against Quimby for mayor.
Marge makes Homer promise not to embarrass her when they visit Itchy & Scratchy Land, "the violentest place on earth." Blackboard: 'I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.'.
A family discussion of love yields stories (seen in flashbacks) that all end in heartbreak.
Lisa is dumbfounded by a new classmate who's younger, smarter and her competitor for first-chair sax. Meanwhile, Homer tries to profit after a truck spills its load of sugar.
The Simpsons get a pool, but a broken leg sinks the summer for Bart. Blackboard: 'Beans are neither fruit nor musical'.
Homer teaches a class on "Secrets of a Successful Marriage," but sharing secrets about his own union gets him kicked out of the house. Blackboard: 'Five days is not too long to wait for a gun'.
Grandpa Simpson falls for Marge's mother, but loses out to a competitor; Bart gets ripped off shopping at home with Homer's credit card.
Bart can clear Mayor Quimby's nephew of a charge of battery, but only by implicating himself as a hooky player. Blackboard: 'There are plenty of businesses like show business'.
Bart takes his dog to school, which gets Skinner fired, which in turn leaves Bart missing his archnemesis. Blackboard: 'I will not celebrate meaningless milestones'.
Bart is picked to be Burns' heir and moves into the Burns mansion, prompting Homer and Marge to hire a deprogrammer to get him back. Blackboard: 'The pledge of Allegiance does not end with hail satan'.
Bart wins an elephant, but Homer won't let him keep it. Blackboard: 'Organ transplants are best left to the professionals'.
Flanders' extra ticket to the big game makes him Homer's new best friend, a role that sorely tests Flanders' patience. Blackboard: 'I am not delightfully saucy'.
Homer and Barney compete to be the first "average" American in space.
Lisa's outrage over the gender stereotypes reinforced by a new talking doll prompts her to confront the dollmaker (Kathleen Turner).
Homer accompanies Apu to the Kwik-E-Mart home office---in India---after Apu is fired. Blackboard: 'I will not go near the kindergarten turtle'.
When an on-air remark catapults Bart to instant stardom, he finds that fame isn't all it's cracked up to be. Blackboard: 'My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man'.
Homer leads a vigilante group to catch the Springfield Cat Burglar (voice of Sam Neill), who then robs the museum. Blackboard: 'I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers'.
Legalized gambling comes to Springfield, and Marge becomes addicted; Robert Goulet entertains at Bart's casino for kids. Blackboard: 'I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause'.
Homer is attracted to a pretty power-plant worker (voice of Michelle Pfeiffer), and Werner Klemperer speaks for the guardian angel who helps Homer fight temptation. Blackboard: 'All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy.'.
Bart joins the Junior Campers, which isn't all bad until he goes on a rafting trip that includes Flanders and "celebrity dad" Ernest Borgnine.
Springfield emulates Bart after he's praised by a self-help guru. James Brown has a cameo at Springfield's Do What You Want festival.
Marge's wild night out with neighbor Ruth (Pamela Reed) includes running from the police in Ruth's car, stolen from her ex.
Homer sells his soul; Vampire Burns invites the Simpsons for dinner; Bart sees a gremlin damaging his school bus.
Burns longs for a childhood toy that winds up in the grip of Maggie.
Homer takes Nuclear Physics 101 at the local college, where he gets a trio of nerdy tutors expelled for extracurricular activities.
The Simpsons go incognito to avoid the newly paroled Sideshow Bob, who's out to get Bart. Blackboard: 'The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy'.
Homer recalls when he, Apu, Barney and Principal Skinner became recording icons---after Barney replaced Chief Wiggum, on the advice of their manager. Blackboard: 'I will never win an emmy'.
Johnny Carson, Bette Midler, Luke Perry, Hugh Hefner and the Red Hot Chili Peppers help Krusty when his show is canceled after a new star causes his ratings to plummet. Blackboard: 'I will not charge admission to the bathroom'.
Lionel Hutz represents Marge after Apu catches her accidentally taking an item from his store. Blackboard: 'I do not have diplomatic immunity'.
Barry White helps Lisa's effort to save snakes from Whacking Day. And, Bart is expelled from Springfield Elementary. Blackboard: 'I will return the seeing-eye dog'.
Lisa and Bart write an Itchy and Scratchy episode; Homer makes up a missing high-school credit. Blackboard: 'I will not sell miracle cures'.
Bart's prank hospitalizes Homer, whose life flashes by (in past clips) before he goes into a coma. Blackboard: 'No one is interested in my underpants'.
Union president Homer fights to keep the dental plan. Blackboard: 'Mud is not one of the 4 food groups'.
Homer goes on the wagon after a drunken-driving arrest; Lisa's science project pits Bart's brain against a hamster's. Blackboard: 'Goldfish don't bounce'.
Chief Wiggum's son has a crush on Lisa after she gives him a Valentine out of pity. Blackboard: 'I will not call the principal "spud head".'
Homer's neglect sends Bart looking for a new father; Lisa battles addiction to a "Springfield Heights, 90210" star. Blackboard: 'The principal's toupee is not a frisbee.'
A relative passes away and the Simpson clan goes to the Funeral. After Selma receives a videotaped warning about dying alone, she wants a baby. Blackboard: 'I will not yell "she's dead" during roll call.'
Leonard Nimoy is among the first to ride Springfield's new monorail, opposed by Marge. Phil Hartman plays the monorail salesman. Blackboard: 'I will not eat things for money'.
The stresses of life and his eating habits catch up and Homer sees a discount doctor for a coronary bypass. Blackboard: 'Coffee is not for kids'.
Maggie (Elizabeth Taylor) speaks, but not before the story of Lisa's first word is recalled, as well as how the 1984 Soviet Olympic boycott hurt Krusty.
Adam West and Linda Ronstadt have cameos as Homer and Barney become competitors in the snow-plowing business. Blackboard: 'A burp is not an answer'.
Sara Gilbert plays a new neighbor who captures---and breaks---Bart's heart; Homer sues after a restaurant denies him "all you can eat."
Burns tries to please a new employee---Marge---with singer Tom Jones. Meanwhile, Bart cries "wolf" too often. Blackboard: 'I will not teach others to fly'.
Bart is punished by being barred from the Itchy and Scratchy movie. Blackboard: 'I will not bury the new kid'.
A Halloween trilogy includes a murderous Krusty doll; a "King Kong" parody; an invasion of zombies unleashed by Bart's incantation.
Lisa meets Bob Hope (who has a voice cameo) when she becomes Little Miss Springfield, a title she inherits after the winner's struck by lightning.
Homer decides to skip church permanently, and God gives His OK in Homer's dream. Blackboard: 'I will not defame New Orleans'.
Marge is cast in a version of "A Streetcar Named Desire," playing Blanche to Ned Flanders' Stanley.
Bart leads an uprising at Krusty's summer camp after he and Lisa are subjected to a Dickensian sweatshop.
Homer's stepbrother asks for a loan after Homer is awarded some cash, presented by Smokin' Joe Frazier. Blackboard: 'I will not fake seizures'.
Bart resents Milhouse's new girlfriend; Homer gets the wrong subliminal tape, which has him gaining vocabulary, not losing weight. Blackboard: 'I will not snap bras'.
Spinal Tap hits Springfield, and Otto the bus driver hits the skids after being fired, taking refuge in the Simpsons' garage. Blackboard: 'I will not spin the turtle'.
Bart suspects something rotten when Selma gets engaged to Sideshow Bob (Kelsey Grammer). Blackboard: 'Funny noises are not funny'.
Marge fears a cheatin' heart when a waitress-country singer asks Homer to be her manager. Blackboard: 'I will not conduct my own fire drills'.
Santa's Little Helper notices resentment after the Simpsons make sacrifices to fund his life-saving operation. Blackboard: 'I saw nothing unusual in the teachers lounge'.
The results from their aptitude tests cause Bart and Lisa to make 180-degree turns in their behavior. Blackboard: 'I will not barf unless I'm sick'.
Burns hires Major League ringers for the plant softball championship.
Bart's answer to detention from Mrs. Krabappel is to answer her personal ad with letters from a Mr. Wonderful, but his last laugh is more of a guilty whimper. Meanwhile, Homer makes a bet with Flanders that if he tries to stop swearing, Flanders will shave off his mustache.
A stressed Marge vacations alone, leaving Bart and Lisa with Patty and Selma, and Maggie with Homer---until she leaves in search of Marge. Blackboard: 'I will not spank others'.
From 1992: Lisa's ability to pick winning football teams kicks off a strong bond with Homer---which might end with the upcoming Super Bowl.
Bart fools the town into thinking there's a little boy trapped in a well. Sting performs "We're Sending Our Love down the Well." Blackboard: 'I will not carve gods'.
A trip down memory lane to the early days of Simpson wedded bliss, when Marge was with child and Homer was without a job.
Burns sells the power plant to a German corporation that doesn't care for Homer's approach to his work.
Homer's new drink makes Moe's hot enough to draw Aerosmith, who perform "Walk This Way." Meanwhile, Lisa has invited her friends over for a slumber party which causes problems for Bart. Blackboard: 'Underwear should be worn on the inside'.
When Homer helps Bart build a soapbox racer, it does little for the car but a lot for their relationship. Meanwhile, Patty and Selma get a hair makeover. Blackboard: 'I will not fake rabies'.
From 1991: After disappointing Lisa, Homer buys her a pony, solving one problem, but creating others, requiring a second job---at Apu's Quik-e-Mart. Blackboard: 'Bart "Bucks" are not legal tender'.
Halloween, 1991: Maggie uses one of three wishes; a mind-reading Bart rules Springfield; Homer donates his brain to Mr. Burns' science project.
Bart and Lisa use theological arguments to try to reunite Krusty the Clown and his rabbi father (Jackie Mason), who disowned Krusty when he turned from rabbi to clown.
Homer's averting of a nuclear meltdown earns him employee-of-the-month honors---and a call from Magic Johnson; Milhouse's parents prohibit him from playing with Bart. Blackboard: 'I will not squeak chalk'.
While working for Fat Tony (Joe Mantegna), Bart gains enough influence with his boss to solve his problems with Principal Skinner---perhaps permanently.
Flanders suffers a failure after Homer wishes him ill. Blackboard: 'Nobody likes sunburn slappers.'.
Lisa's essay wins the Simpsons a trip to Washington, D.C., where her faith in democracy is shaken by her unethical Congressman. Blackboard: ' Spitwads Are Not Free Speech'.
A deviation from his norm lands Homer in a mental institution, where he shares a room with a man who thinks he's Michael Jackson.
From 1991: After Bart's blood saves Burns, Homer sends his boss a nasty letter for falling short of the material gratitude that Homer expected. Blackboard: 'I will not sleep through my education.'.
Bart earns less than he expected doing chores for a neighbor (Cloris Leachman), so he goes partners with Milhouse and Martin on a rare comic book. Blackboard: 'I will Not Show Off'.
Homer and Marge attend a marriage retreat, where Homer catches a legendary fish---and maybe more. Blackboard: 'I will not do anything bad ever again.'
Lisa finds that Homer pales in comparison with her substitute teacher, as does Bart with his opponent for class president.
Ringo Starr has a cartoon cameo as Marge gets to paint a portrait of Mr. Burns. Blackboard: 'I will not hide behind the fifth amendment'.
Grandpa Simpson loses his love, leaving him with a heavy heart---and a heavy wallet when his sweetie leaves him money in her will. Blackboard: 'I will not grease the monkey bars'.
Bart's dog is sent to obedience school after he destroys Homer's expensive new sneaks. Blackboard: 'I will not sell school property.'
Danny DeVito is the voice of Homer's wealthy long-lost half brother, who makes the mistake of giving Homer an important job. Blackboard: 'I will not sell land in Florida'.
Bart benefits when Principal Skinner falls for his Aunt Patty, who has Skinner but doesn't want him, while Aunt Selma has naught but want. Blackboard: 'I will not belch the national anthem'.
After learning eternal hell is the price for stealing, Lisa decides she'd rather go to heaven than watch pirated cable. Blackboard: 'I will not make flatulent noises in class'.
Marge and Homer reveal how they met as they tell a tale of love at first sight (but only for one) and the high-school prom they attended (but not together). Blackboard 'I will not get very far with this attitude'.
Homer takes to sushi like a fish to water, but an apprentice chef may have given Homer some bad blowfish---and 24 hours to live. Blackboard: 'I will not cut corners'.
A lawyer suggests there may be profit in the pain after Bart suffers minor injuries in a collision with Burns' car. Blackboard: 'I will not sell school property'.
Marge's protests over cartoon violence lead to a cultural renaissance in Springfield. Blackboard: ''I will not pledge allegiance to Bart.'.
After seeing a daredevil at a truck rally, Bart discovers his reason for living---a career in death defiance. Blackboard: 'I will not drive the principal's car.'.
On Thanksgiving, Bart runs away after accidentally wrecking Lisa's centerpiece. Blackboard: 'I will not do that thing with my tongue'.
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Lisa gives Bart some tips on handling the pressure in a miniature-golf grudge match with a neighbor's son. Blackboard: 'I am not a 32 year old woman.'
Homer's success as the mascot of Springfield's minor-league ball club earns him a shot at the majors, in Capital City.
Homer's boss, Burns, wants to be governor to lower nuclear-safety standards to keep his plant on line. Blackboard 'I will not Xerox my Butt'.
Halloween tales include a family in a haunted house; a misunderstanding with aliens; and a rendition of "The Raven."
Homer lies on a medical insurance form in order to obtain a miracle hair restoring drug. Blackboard: 'Tar is not a plaything.'
In exchange for study tips, Bart gives the class brain anti-geek lessons, but regrets it when the brain becomes too Bart-like. Blackboard: 'I will not encourage others to fly'.
Homer takes Marge out for a romantic night, leaving the kids with a sitter---who's profiled on "America's Most Armed and Dangerous." Blackboard: 'I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom'.
Bart's TV hero Krusty the Clown is arrested for a convenience-store robbery, and witness Homer must testify against the clown. Blackboard: 'They are laughing at me, not with me'.
A little story about how Bart saves France after blowing up Principal Skinner's mom with a cherry bomb. A Albanian child comes to stay with the Simpsons in his place and becomes Homers tag along buddy. Blackboard: 'Garlic gum is not funny'.
Shutterbug Bart captures Homer with a sexy entertainer at a bachelor party. Blackboard: 'I will not call my teacher 'Hot Cakes".'
Homer's bowling-ball gift "for Marge" prompts her to take up the sport---and maybe also a handsome instructor who offers to teach her "many things."
Bart pulls a stunt that shocks the entire town, including the new friends he was trying to impress. Blackboard: 'I did not see Elvis'.
The Simpsons put the wild back in the wilderness when their RV goes over a cliff and Homer and Bart go for help, get lost and lose their clothes. Blackboard: 'I will not draw naked ladies in class'.
The meaning of life and second grade have Lisa playing the blues solo---until she jams with a kindred spirit; Homer seeks tutelage to beat Bart at video boxing. Blackboard: 'I will not instigate revolution'.
Terrorized by the school bully, Bart seeks counsel from Grandpa Simpson, who takes him to a warfare expert for basic training.
After seeing families being nice to each other at a company picnic, Homer orders the Simpsons to a family therapist. Blackboard: 'I will not burp in class'.
After being fired from the nuclear power plant for negligence, Homer becomes a safety activist. Blackboard: 'I will not skateboard in the halls'.
Bart is moved to a school for the gifted after he switches aptitude tests with another boy. Blackboard: 'I will not waste chalk'.
Homer's Christmas bonus is canceled and the rainy-day funds are needed to pay for Bart's tattoo removal in the first full-length episode of the subversive animated satire about Springfield's hapless first family.
This one-hour special honors the legacy of the third-season episode "Homer at the Bat", featuring interviews from some of the episode's guest stars and six minutes of never-before seen footage of the show.
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